You Can't Make This Shit Up

From the "You Can't Make This Shit Up" department:

I know where the two climbers missing from Mt. Hood are:

Seriously.

I saw this in a news report yesterday ... "Mr. Wampler" is a local climbing person in Oregon and was asked where he thought the two missing hikers might have gone.

Using his response, which I've quoted below, and my own amazing powers of deductive reasoning, I know where they are.

First, read this quote I pulled from Yahoo news yesterday:

Kelly James and his two colleagues are thought to have climbed the north face of Mount Hood and reached the 11,239-foot summit late in the day of Friday, and then tried to descend the gentler south face, passing through a rock and ice formation known as "the Pearly Gates," Wampler said.

"They didn't find it," he said.

Now prepare yourself for today's "Oh Eric" moment:

I don't think I'm making any waves here when I say they're dead.

They're dead.

And if they didn't find The Pearly Gates...

Then they're obviously in Hell.

(Yep. I said it.)