Because This is How America Works

I admit it. I was wrong. Donald Trump has won the presidency. Regardless of how the popular vote goes, presidents are not elected by popular vote. It's the Electoral Collage. Because this is how America works.

On the second Wednesday after the first Tuesday in November of a Leap Year, America historically has a reset. We have a new, or re-elected, president. New, or re-elected House of Representatives, and one-third new or re-elected Senators. Because this is how America works.

It would be easy (especially for me) to rant, rave, throw things, kick puppies, (well, maybe not kick puppies), swear, threaten to move (oh, wait, I just covered that, I can't get into Canada) or the like, But I'm not going to do that. America has spoken. Our half-black progressive-leaning gay-loving president maybe went a bit too far on the pendulum, and now America has decided to swing it back the other direction.  Because this is how America works.

To my friends who supported Donald Trump, congratulations. Your candidate won. Moving forward, I will no longer refer to him by any of the names I called him during the election cycle, as he will be president, and I have respect for the office. Moving forward, I will refer to him as President-Elect until January 20th, then as President Trump. Because this is how America works.

I will not say he is not my president, or that I didn't elect him. I will not leave this country. I will not turn my back on politics, or the political process. I'm an American. He's the President-Elect of the United States of America. He will be my president on January 20, 2017. Because this is how America works.

To my friends who did not support President-Elect Trump, I see your pain. And I feel it too. But don't give up. We can't give up. We have to look at what happened. Take it in. Examine it. Digest it. Fix it. Starting in 2018. And try again in 2020. Because this is how America works.

In the short-term, feel free to blame the DNC. The Clintons. The Russians. Fox News. Your racist uncle. The FBI. CNN. WikiLeaks. People who believed WikiLeaks. Print Media. Gary Johnson. Jill Stein. Whoeverthehell that Mormon guy was. Blame whoever you want. It doesn't matter. Blaming anyone never fixed anything. And this isn't the time for the "Don't Blame Me I Voted For Her" or "Don't Blame Me I Wanted Bernie" mentality. This is the time to mobilize. To organize. To remain or become vigilant in your actions, and speech, and set the stage for 2018's mid-term elections. And 2020 general election. Because this is how America works.

It's time to look to the future. While campaigning, President-Elect Trump made spouted some crazy solutions. And who knows, maybe some of them will work. Maybe a new direction IS needed in Washington, and maybe he can bring it. We need to work on our infrastructure. Our roads, bridges, schools, water delivery systems (remember Flint, Michigan?). Want to "Make America Great Again," President-Elect Trump? Move your industries to America (notice I did not say "Back to America" because they've never been here). Want to employ Americans and recreate the middle class? Buy American-made steel for your buildings. America works when Americans work. Because this is how America works.

And, because this is how America works, President-Elect Trump will have a Republican House of Representatives, a Republican Senate, and a majority of state legislatures led by Republicans. There should literally be NOTHING in the way of stopping the Trump Train. Perhaps, for the first time since President Obama had a Democratic House & Senate his first two years in office, something can get done in Washington. Because this is how America works.

If not, or if the Republicans who have said they can not support a President Trump follow through with their actions, and again, nothing gets done, Americans have a choice in 2018 to reshuffle the House and one-third of the Senate in the mid-term elections (yes, they still happen).  As it happened in 2010, when the Tea Party swept into the  national spotlight and the Republicans gained six Senate seats and 63 House seats. Because this is how America works.

Politics aside, if you woke up on Wednesday, regardless of how you voted, or if you voted, you're alive. You have a voice. You still have your Constitutional rights, and nobody's dragging you off to prison for words you say, or thoughts you have as long as you're not inspiring hate, or hurting others. Because this is how America works.

Americas overwhelmingly came to the polls, and voted what's in their hearts, heads, and beings. And we have the President-Elect we have, and the Congress, and the Senate. Now we have to make them work. For us. Because this is how America works.

Some days, you just have to laugh. (Also Known As Eric is trying to fix something)

I work from home, as most of you know, and rarely have to wear pants or venture out during the day, so my car doesn't get driven that often.  Since we got a brand new Honda at the end of August, it's gotten driven a whole lot less. Like maybe twice a month or so, usually if I have shit to do on a Saturday when Allie's working, or I need to go get my mail. Or I decided to take an actual lunch break, put on pants and grab some drive-thru. But apparently, I've not done either of those for a couple of weeks. 

Last Saturday, we decided to drive my car downtown for the Youngstown Beer Fest, figuring on taking a cab home, then collecting it the next morning. Parking overnight downtown can sometimes be shady, so why subject the new car to it, right?

Right.

Unfortunately, my car wouldn't start. Had that clicking sound that usually means battery. I've had my share of shitmobiles, I know that sound. Not a big deal. I'll go down on Sunday and use my portable jump starter battery pack. 

Which I promptly forget about until Allie reminded me of last night. 

And I realized the portable jump starter battery pack has been in the trunk since, oh, the car before this. Including all winter. Which usually drains batteries.

Yep.

It's dead, Jim. It wasn't charged at all. Not even enough juice to register a blip.

No problem. I'll just charge it up overnight, right?

Nope. 

The wall charger is not in the box. Meaning it's probably in the box of miscellaneous kitchen materials in my storage unit, packed away since November. And while I probably have a charger that will fit the hole, I have no idea if it matches the polarity, amperage, or voltage. I'm not an electrical engineer by any stretch of the imagination, but I do know charging an acid-based portable jump starter battery pack with an unknown charger is probably not a good idea.

Okay, so I'll just charge it in the car as we headed to Akron for The Clarks and Erica Blinn & The Handsome Machine last night. It's like 2/3rds charged. Should work.

Should.

Before I start, being the eternal optimist, I pop the key in the ignition, turn it hoping to hear the 2.2 Liter Ecotec engine roar to life. But I get nothing and have to like it. 

Not even a click. 

No worries. I'll charge it, jump it and drive around for an hour or so. It's Saturday, I got nothing else to do until later, so I'm cool with that.

So I pop the hood and start looking for the battery. Now, mind you, I've had this car about five months, and this is the second time I've been under the hood looking for something. The first time was when the power steering stopped being power steering. I figured it needed fluid.

Nope.

Electronic Power Assist Steering. No fluid. Anywhere.

So I came up empty on that. And all summer, when the wires got too hot, the power steering quits. Quality is job 1 at GM, right?

Nope.

Anyway, back to the battery. I can't find it.

Seriously.

Like I said, I've had my share of shitmobiles. I'm quite proficient at changing batteries, alternators, tires, radiator hoses, all the things that go wrong in shitmobiles. 

But I can't find the battery.  

I see a post that looks like a battery post, but it's connected to the fuse box. Okay. This makes no sense. And what do we do when things make no sense these days?

HereLetMeGoogleThatForYou

How To: Change The Battery In Your Cobalt

Step 1 Open truck, remove anything in there, and remove the carpet panel, exposing the spare tire well and battery box.

WTF? Really, Google? It's in the trunk? THE TRUNK? 

Whoever designed this car must have been higher than Snoop on a day off.

Fine. 

Further googling tells me there is a way to jump start it. That post I mentioned? Totally the positive connection. And I don't see ... oh, wait, there's the Negative symbol on ... it looks like ... yep, the shock absorber bolt.

Okay.

I use their suggested method of jumping the car with the portable jump starter battery pack, and I'm getting nothing. Turn the key?

The Sounds of Silence. 

Great song, but a bad result when you're trying to jump a car with a portable jump starter battery pack. 

Then I remember I have jumper cables in the trunk. Because I've owned my share of shitmobiles. They're very handy to have. I recommend them to everyone. No worries. I'll get the new Honda, park in front, use the suggested method of jumping the battery. Yeah, that'll work.

Nope.

I can't get the key out of the ignition.  It won't go from ACC to LOCK without power, apparently, because of the security system I still haven't figured out. 

Yep. I can't get the key out of the ignition.

WAIT.

I have a trunk monkey button. I'll just use that.

Nope.

The internal trunk release relies on power. And I have no juice. I mean, none.

Some days, you just have to laugh.