See, I *told* you. You don't listen.

My friends Two Cow Garage were featured on MSNBC in an article talking about how alt-country pioneers Son Volt, Wilco and Drive-By Truckers are moving away from the genre, then there's III ... the new album by Two Cow Garage.

Oh yes. Oh yes. OH FUCK YES.

That's good work boys.

(see, I *told* you people that III was a great fucking album. When did I say that? February 23, 2007. And you can go back, read my review here and realize that Eric knows what the fuck he's talking about.


Then summon voluptuous red-headed women to worship me accordingly.

Cause that's how I roll.

And I'm rolling up to Buffalo on May 4th to see Two Cow Garage at Mohawk Place, and into Columbus on May 12 to see Two Cow Garage at Little Brother's.)

Song of the Day

"On Monday"
Aaron Tashjian

She's not so pretty when she rains on me
Daybreak rolls around by five
You can't trust that bitter weekday handshake
That just won't fool you while you're alive

So I put all my best wishes in a bottle
And I float it down Park Avenue okay
And I never known a feeling
That's worse than the feeling
That's stuck inside my head today
On Monday

You can't be serious hoping for
A romantic or a balladeer
An honest heart can't seem to beat around here
It faded long ago from the vanity mirror

So I put all my best wishes in a bottle
And I float it down Park Avenue okay
And I never known a feeling
That's worse than the feeling
That's stuck inside my head today
On Monday


Random Un-Rhetorical Questions

Cause I just feel like asking questions sometimes ... is that so wrong? (Oh, wait, you think so? Bugger off then. Be gone with ya.)


I love Chalkboard Manifesto. You should too. Because it rocks. Click here for more.

If four guys pull up to an intersection, and all four have stop signs, and all four stop at the same time ... who's from Youngstown?

Answer: The Italian guy in the Camaro.

When should jealous behavior be expected in a relationship?

Answer: Never. But certainly not after spending a mere two hours together, eh? (blank stare)

Question: What's a good acronym for attention seeking, drama llama riding, insane nutjob?

Answer: Damn, I wish I knew. So far all I've gotten is DLRASIN ... which sounds like a old person trying to get away with something ... a.k.a. a raisin on the down-low.


Event Recap ....

This goes with the Photo Blog posted yesterday:

3/23 - Two Cow Garage. Yeah, it rocked. One of the best ways to end a show is with a song that just makes you scream out all you have left.

Once again, these boys showed they bring the rock. Tossing "Epitaph" out after the end of "Postcards and Apologies = genius. And damn, makes a fan wanna drive to Buffalo on May 4th. Todd May opened. I forget how much I like this dude until I see him again. He's my kind of music.

3/31 - Taylor Hicks. Now I don't watch American Idol. I don't watch much on TV to be honest with you. So I'd not heard anything he's sung. Or seen him, other than a picture or two. So I had no idea what to expect. It was a good show. Would I rush out to see him again? No. But I had a 12-year-old and a 16-year-old with me - both attending their first real concert ... so that was fun. The window-licking couple beside us that kissed, and hugged, and fought, and bitched and moaned were also entertaining. David Warren opened. If he lived in Hawaii, not Alabama, his name would have been Jack Johnson.

4/1 - Wrestlemania 23. Anytime you can go to the pinnacle event of any organization - your company's annual stockholder meeting, the World Series, Super Bowl, Stanley Cup finals ... whatever ... take the opportunity, even if you're not a fan (and I am wrestling fan, so it was even better). Big-time over the top production, and it was worth the trip. Two quick funny crowd stories: Bought the tickets off a guy in Florida on eBay. Drove to Detroit. Sat next to two guys who bought their tickets from the same dude on eBay. And drove to Detroit. From Youngstown. Where I work ... and 10 miles from where I live. How weird is that? Second - the guy in front of me who was yelling out things to the wrestlers ... expected. Me laughing at him ... unexpected. Sorry, but when you have a speech impediment and everything you yell sounds fucked up, I have to laugh. I can't help it. I'm that evil.

4/5 - Aaron Tashjian & Friends. Driving to Oxford to see this gang was quite the adventure ... and we found a very expensive martini bar (Miami University is a money school) that had $1 PBR drafts. Fuck yeah. Hanging out with Mark Nye & Aaron and Rob Heath again ... always fun. Meeting John Kengla from Red Wanting Blue - added bonus.

The highlights:
  • Aaron singing with a tampon tied to the microphone.
  • Aaron singing "Jessie's Girl" ... or as much as he could remember.
  • Aaron singing "Wild Horses" by the Rolling Stones. Well.
  • Aaron singing "Missing You" from "Circus Tent Revival" ... hell yeah.
4/6 - Aaron Tashjian & Friends. Andyman's Treehouse is my favorite place to take pictures. The sound sucks. The light suck. You're literally on top of every other person in the room. And when there are those in the room who detest the fact you still walk the earth, it's even better. FUCK YEAH.

No crazy covers tonight, just good old Aaron Tashjian rock and roll. With Mando-Quinn (Quinn Fallon on mandolin) joining in.

4/6 - Quinn Fallon. Quinn opened the show with a great set of new songs and a couple of old favorites from the X-Rated Cowboys. His new solo album is nearly finished ... I can't wait to hear it.


Massive Photo Updates

Just kinda dropping some old business in a hurry with a blast-out of eight photo pages updated or added to my website:

Ryan Cox - March 20, 2007

Two Cow Garage - March 23, 2007

Todd May - March 23, 2007

Taylor Hicks - March 31, 2007

Wrestlemania 23 - April 1, 2007

Mark Nye (playing bass for Aaron Tashjian) April 5, 2007

Aaron Tashjian & Friends - April 6, 2007

Quinn Fallon - March 20, 2007


Wow, this is fitting

And if you click on it, you'll see it full size.

Hmmm ... how fitting, eh?


Ponder this:

From the genius that is The Clarks:

"I need everything that you need
I breathe the same air that you breathe"

My take: This is all you need to know about a relationship:

First line: I need everything that you need

Deep down, we all need the same things ... support, belief, kindness, love. So think about what you need from a partner, and offer that in return. Odds are you'll get what you give.

Second line: I breathe the same air that you breathe

This one really struck me because until I really thought about, I didn't get it. Yeah, we all breathe the same air ... but on a metaphysical level ... think about it this way: If you pollute the air around you with jealousy, bitterness or other issues directed at someone you're either involved with, hung up on, afraid of or can't get over, you're breathing that pollution in, too. And it shows.

Me ... I prefer clean air.

Me ... I prefer someone who gives as well as receives.

And I refuse to accept anything less.

I'm learning to recognize both patterns in people.

I see it quickly.

I note it.

I validate it.

I walk the fuck away.


End of rant.

The song can be found on "Fast Moving Cars" which is quickly becoming one of my absolute favorite albums ... and one I wasn't all that fond of a couple of years ago.

"Wait A Minute"

Wait a minute can we stop the car right here
Can I take a picture here can I
Have a second just to take in all the sights
All the southern stars and northern lights
Wait a minute can we put aside the past
Can we make it something last for life

Say wrong say right tonight
Say wrong say right tonight

Wait a minute can you play that song again
It makes me think about a friend can I
Have a second can you take me back in time
Close my eyes and hear her voice her rhyme
Wait a minute can I say I'm sorry now
I admit I don't know how or why

Say wrong say right tonight
I need everything that you need
I breathe the same air that you breathe
Say wrong say right tonight
I need everything that you need
I breathe the same air that you breathe

And I've been wrong now for so long
I'm just trying to get it right


Song of the Day

Just For The Record

Many's the time I've been thinking about changing my ways
But when it gets right down to it it's the same drunken haze
I'm serving a sentence to write life's sentences
It's only when I'm out of it I make sense of this

Just for the record I'm gonna put it down,
Just for the record I'm gonna change my life around

Just a revolutionary with a pseudonym
Just a barroom dancer on my final fling
Just another writer paying off my dues
Just finding inspiration well that's my excuse

Just for the record I'm gonna put it down,
Just for the record I'm gonna change my life around
Just another empty gesture with an empty glass
Just another comic actor behind a tragic mask

But I've got no discipline got no self control
Just a little less painful here when my back's against the wall

It's too late, I found, it's too far, I'm in two minds
Both of them are out of it at the bar

When you say I got a problem that's a certainty
But I can put it all right down to eccentricity
It's just for the record it's just a passing phase
Just for the record I can stop any day


You think you know about me?

All I can say is I hope you were paying attention.

Yes, this is on the quiz!

Click here to take the quiz on me, then click here for the scoreboard and see how well you've done.

So put your money where your mouth is.

I dare you.


I miss Kevin Stevens

Wow. I had forgotten about this. Totally *not* for those with sensitive ears. Or underage. Or who have never heard the voracity of trash talk from hockey players.

With that being said, on with the show:

Found here: http://www.themightymjd.com/category/hockey/


Fox News = GENIUS.

So get this:

Today, as Iran declares "Nuclear Day" ... Iraq also declares today a celebration because it was four years ago that U.S. forces liberated Baghdad.

And Fox News had the best take on this, ever.

Shepperd Smith said today's anti-American protests that raged across Iraq were proof that our mission is successful.

"Four years ago Iraqi's couldn't protest in public."

I love Fox News.


Breaking rocks in the hot sun

Yeah, I fought the law(s) ... and the laws won.

Well, not The Law. Not Johnny Law. Not The Man. The 5-0. Pick your name your gang, group, ethnic background or heritage currently uses to designate police activity in the area from this list ... but be aware I didn't fight any of them.

Nope, no stainless steel bracelets; no stupid human tricks; no free ride downtown (Yeah, a DRI shout out in a blog. I'm so xhardxcorex) ... but no, nothing like that.

And despite spending a day in Dayton, I wasn't arrested (this time. And the time I was is a story for another day.)

And I didn't fight the laws of physics, either, like my previous entry about the wreck in Monroe, Ohio. Despite the wicked bad snow on the North Coast on the Egg Eve (that's the Saturday before Easter), there's nary a mark on Icey Blue.

(check this shit out - this is the wicked bad snow ... taken 2007-04-08 at 4:03 a.m. as I was driving through Geauga County. Yeah. Genius me drives from Strongsville across I-90 to Route 2 to Mentor on the Lake down Route 44 to Route 422. In an April blizzard. Cause that's how I roll ... or slide as I did a couple of times last night. Photo taken with camera phone at the car dealer at the intersection of Ohio Route 44 and US Route 322).

I did a lot of driving in the past four days, I've covered a good portion of the state of Ohio, and when I drive, I like to think. And I was thinking about the kind of woman I'm attracted to. And tried to fight myself into thinking outside my box, while driving my little blue box.

I fought with the laws of attraction. And as is always the case, the laws wons.

Because attraction is a funny thing. It's so totally subjective. Everyone has standards, everyone has wants, likes, dislikes. Everyone has that thing they need to see or feel from another person to know if they wish to go further.

For some, the eyes have it. For others, it's a smile. And while some other brothers can deny, there are those who like big butts and cannot lie. Or maybe a great rack.

But I'm the guy who looks beyond that. Not to say I don't notice a great rack, but I look for more than just a great rack. Because when you find someone physically attractive, and are then generally attracted to them, that's good. And if you're lucky, you then find there's more to the attraction than just that spark (or series of sparks) that opened the door, that's good, too.

That's the part of the attraction that I need to have - that which is beyond the physical.

And then there's other side of that. The person who you find attractive, but aren't attracted to. You like them, but not in that way.

And you wonder why.

And you wonder if you can have that beyond the physical without that spark.

I've learned Jon Landau was right when he told Bruce Springsteen during the Born In The USA recording sessions, while perusing a stack of 120+ songs, that there wasn't a hit there, because you can't start a fire without a spark.

Oh well, I'm tired of sitting around here trying to write this book. Good night. And Happy Easter to the Christians out there. Don't read the other entry until after your holiday is over.

Well, that doesn't make sense

I had the greatest discussion about Easter this week with a member of the God Squad who interrupted my oatmeal at breakfast at Cracker Barrel:

God Squad Member: So are you ready to give thanks to Jesus in celebration of his resurrection on Easter Sunday?

Me (pissed off because I just wanna eat and read my newspaper, but I engage in conversation because I have time to kill): I don't celebrate Easter that way. I just eat chocolate rabbits and color eggs.

GSM: Oh. Well, that's not very spiritual.

Me: No. I have trouble believing in all of that.

GSM: Well, perhaps I can answer your questions.

Me: (salivating at the turn of this conversation cause I love engaging in debate): Let's start at the beginning.

GSM: Like how far back?

Me: Just the Jesus story. Jesus was born on December 25th, right?

GSM: Yes.

Me: And he was sentenced to death on Palm Sunday, right?

GSM: Yes.

Me: And was crucified on Good Friday and died?

GSM: Yes.

Me: And then three days later he rose from the dead and ascended into Heaven, right?

GSM: Yes. That's Easter Sunday. I'm impressed. You know quite a bit for not really believing in it.

Me: I'm a reader. I've read the Bible twice. So let me ask you this: How do you know those dates?

GSM: The Bible explains it all.

Me: Yeah, I've read that. And the Bible said Jesus was born on December 25th, which was just an regular day back then, because, well, Santa wasn't invented until the 1800's.

GSM: Yes. And sadly, yes, on Santa.

Me: But we're positive on the date, right?

GSM: Yes. The Bible says that's the day.

Me: Okay. And that's solidly accepted in our culture because we celebrate and-or bastardize that day starting in, oh, September in some retail establishments.

GSM: Unfortunately.

Me: Jesus was 33 when he died, right?

GSM: Yes. The son of God was killed by the Romans, who were afraid of the one true son showing the imperfections of man.

Me: But we don't know the exact dates of the crucifixion, death and resurrection, do we?

GSM: Well, yeah, we know it started on Good Friday.

Me: Which is not only a different date every year, but fluctuates between the months of March and April. But always on Friday, like we have federal holidays on Mondays so government workers can have an extra day off.

GSM: There's a formula they use.

Me: Oh really. (Now if you know me, you know that's the key phrase that pays ... that's the drinking phrase. That's the part of the conversation where Eric gets out his hammer and nails you to the wall, usually with your own words.) Well, that doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me. Can you define 'they' and do you know how 'they' figure it out? And when do 'they' make the calendar? Has to be years ahead of time. And since 'they' can't figure out when Jesus died, despite having legal documentation in a majority of court cases, how come 'they' are absolutely convinced that he was born on December 25th. Were the animals in the barn better recordkeepers? Did the innkeeper only ever have one night when the "No Vacancy" sign was posted? How are 'they' are convinced that December 25th is the day Jesus was born. (and yes, I made the quote marks with my fingers)

GSM: I celebrate Easter when the church calendar says I should. I don't question it. I believe.

Me: Oh. Well, that doesn't make sense either. The Romans are historically noted for amazing record keeping and written logs of all court proceedings, which have been historically accurate and carbon dated on some remains. Yet here, we have no proof and the date always changes and ... and you say you just believe the calendar? A framework made by man? Who's so flawed and imperfect?

GSM (snidely said): Do you know that if you don't believe in Jesus and accept him as your savior you'll burn in hell for eternity?

Me: So I've been threated before. My take: I'll have friends there.

GSM: Not me. When I die I'll be in Heaven with Jesus.

Me: Good luck with that. But let me ask you one last question.

GSM: Okay.

Me: I don't believe in your version of the life and death of your savior because it is flawed and full of holes; why should I believe in the punishment that awaits me for not believing?

GSM: Well, I've taken enough of your time. I'll let you get back to your breakfast.

Me: Yeah. Thanks for the help figuring all that out.

GSM: I don't think I was any help to you at all.

Me: And scene

GSM: What?

Me: Never mind. Have a nice Easter.


Damn, that was close.

So I'm sitting in a hotel room in Monroe, Ohio, waiting to head over to Oxford to see my good friends Aaron Tashjian and Mark Nye rock some faces (along with Rob on drums and John on guitar) when I hear what sounds like a helicopter fly directly over the hotel.


I've stayed at my share of airport properties ... and being the aviation nerd I am, I enjoy the smell of jet fuel in the morning, afternoon or night. And the sounds of high-performance jet engines is soothing music to my ears.

But damn, this one, from the sounds of it, either this was a big-ass helicopter, I was a whole lot closer to the airport than I thought, or this thing was RIGHT THE FUCK ON TOP OF ME.

Turns out, the airport's on the other side of the highway.

This was ... right the fuck outside my window.

This was ... a big-ass Med-evac helicopter.

Picking up some poor bastard who violated one of Sir Issac Newton's Laws of Physics:

No too objects can occupy the same space at the same time.

There was a big ass wreck at the intersection the hotel is located on. And this was the *second* bad wreck I saw today - two people on I-70 eastbound, just outside of Springfield tried to occupy the same space at the same time. One SUV landed on its side, one car was pretty banged up and a whole lot of people were sitting in the 4 mile traffic jam waiting to get around them.

I took these pictures from the window of my hotel of the second wreck:

(click to see larger)

(click to see larger)

See, it was a big-ass helicopter.

(click to see larger)

Yeah, damn, that was close.

So kids, remember when driving, no two objects can occupy the same space at the same time.

Song of the Day

"Sometimes It Snows in April"
~ Prince
Tracy died soon after a long fought civil war,
just after I'd wiped away his last tear
I guess he's better off than he was before,
A whole lot better off than the fools he left here
I used 2 cry 4 Tracy because he was my only friend
Those kind of cars don't pass u every day
I used 2 cry 4 Tracy because I wanted to see him again,
But sometimes sometimes life ain't always the way...

Sometimes it snows in April
Sometimes I feel so bad, so bad
Sometimes I wish life was never ending,
and all good things, they say, never last

Springtime was always my favorite time of year,
A time 4 lovers holding hands in the rain
Now springtime only reminds me of Tracy's tears
Always cry 4 love, never cry 4 pain
He used 2 say so strong unafraid to die
Unafraid of the death that left me hypnotized
No, staring at his picture I realized
No one could cry the way my Tracy cried

Sometimes it snows in April
Sometimes I feel so bad
Sometimes, sometimes I wish that life was never ending,
And all good things, they say, never last

I often dream of heaven and I know that Tracy's there
I know that he has found another friend
Maybe he's found the answer 2 all the April snow
Maybe one day I'll see my Tracy again

Sometimes it snows in April
Sometimes I feel so bad, so bad
Sometimes I wish that life was never ending,
But all good things, they say, never last

All good things that say, never last
And love, it isn't love until it's past