GOP Releases Statement about Personal Flotation Devices:

GOP Releases Statement about Personal Flotation Devices:

Washington DC ~ After careful consideration, Republican Presidential Candidate Mitt Romney has released a statement saying he's against all forms of life jackets and personal flotation devices.

"It's my belief that these devices only encourage risky behavior by protecting people from drowning. The only 100% effective way to prevent drowning is total avoidance of going into the water.

"But, if by chance, you do find find your self struggling with drowning, then no life-saving or other preventative measures or acts should be allowed to be administered. You got yourself into this mess, you have to live with the consequences," Romney said.

He continued, "You should consider drowning a dift. And if by chance you were pushed into the water, don't worry. If it was a legitimate pushing, your body will find a way to shut out the water and survive the drowning."

When asked for comment, President Barack Obama said, "Wait. WHAT?"  

Vice President Joe Biden was too busy gut laughing to make a statement.

Doesn't make much sense when you look at it like that, do ya? Nobody asks to get tossed into a lake when they can't swim ... just like nobody asks for rape or incest. Let alone to get pregnant from rape or incest.



Song of the Day - "Lover's Cross" ~ Jim Croce

Guess that it was bound to happen

Was just a matter of time
But now I've come to my decision
And it's one of the painful kind
'Cause now it seems that you wanted a martyr
Just a regular guy wouldn't do
But baby I can't hang upon no lover's cross for you

I really got to hand it to ya
'Cause girl you really tried
But for every time that we spent laughin'
There were two times that I cried
And you were tryin' to make me your martyr
And that's the one thing I just couldn't do
'Cause baby, I can't hang upon no lover's cross for you

'Cause tables are meant for turnin'
And people are bound to change
And bridges are meant for burnin'
When the people and memories they join aren't the same

Still I hope that you can find
Another who can take what I could not
He'll have to be a super guy
Or maybe a super god
'Cause I never was much of a martyr before
And I ain't bout to start nothin' new
And baby, I can't hang upon no lover's cross for you