Polar Bear Plunge for Cancer

So ... I decided to embark on a fund-raiser ... I'm going to do a Polar Bear Plunge into the icey waters of Lake Milton to raise money for the American Cancer Society.

The goal is $100 per person ... I kicked my campaign off with a $25 donation, then decided to test the website with a $5 donation (because I'm an IT Nerd like that and have to test a link before I can recommend it).

So ... that being said ... I have 19 days to raise $70 ... who's with me?  Click here to donate!

And if you're interested in watching, March 5th at Lake Milton is where the plunging will be happening.

And yeah, I'll be wearing nothing more than a swim suit and sneakers (because it's a long, cold walk to the water ... shoes are needed!)


Facts about Farting

Well, as a guy who is lactose intolerant and loves dairy products, I'm often gassy.  And sometimes, my deflation is legendary in both the sound and the length.

Being a guy who likes to do his research, I stumbled upon a long-lost Q&A about farts from a long-dead forum I used to be part of.  No idea who the original author was, but here are some interesting facts about farts:

What makes farts stink?

The odor of farts comes from small amounts of hydrogen sulfide gas and mercaptans in the mixture. These compounds contain sulfur. Nitrogen-rich compounds such as skatole and indole also add to the stench of farts. The more sulfur-rich your diet, the more sulfides and mercaptans will be produced by the bacteria in your guts, and the more your farts will stink. Foods such as cauliflower, eggs and meat are notorious for producing smelly farts, whereas beans produce large amounts of not particularly stinky farts.

Why are stinky farts generally warmer and quieter than regular farts?

(Question submitted by many, many people!) Most fart gas comes from swallowed air and consists largely of nitrogen and carbon dioxide, the oxygen having been absorbed by the time it reaches the anal opening. These gases are odorless, although they often pick up other (and more odiferous) components on the way through the bowel. They emerge from the anus in fairly large bubbles at body temperature. A person can often achieve a good sound with these voluminous farts, but they are commonly (but not always!) mundane with respect to odor, and don't feel particularly warm.

Another major source of fart gas is bacterial action. Bacterial fermentation and digestion processes produce heat as a byproduct as well as various pungent gases. The resulting bubbles of gas tend to be small, hot, and concentrated with stinky bacterial metabolic products. These emerge as the notorious, warm, SBD (Silent-But-Deadly), often in amounts too small to produce a good sound, but excelling in stench.

How much gas does a normal person pass per day?

On average, a person produces about half a liter of fart gas per day, distributed over an average of about fourteen daily farts. Whereas it may be difficult for you to determine your daily flatus volume, you can certainly keep track of your daily numerical fart count. You might try this as a science fair project: Keep a journal of everything you eat and a count of your farts. You might make a note of the potency of their odor as well. See if you can discover a relationship between what you eat, how much you fart, and how much they smell.

How long does it take fart gas to travel to someone else's nose?

(Question submitted by SteF) Fart travel time depends on atmospheric conditions such as humidity, temperature and wind speed and direction, the molecular weight of the fart particles, and the distance between the fart transmitter and the fart receiver. Farts also disperse (spread out) as they leave the source, and their potency diminishes with dilution. Generally, if the fart is not detected within a few seconds, it will be too dilute for perception and will be lost into the atmosphere forever. Exceptional conditions exist when the fart is released into a small enclosed area such as an elevator, a small room, or a car.

These conditions limit the amount of dilution possible, and the fart may remain in a smellable concentration for a long period of time, until it condenses on the walls.

Why is there a 13 to 20 second delay between farting and the time it starts to smell?

Actually, the fart stinks immediately upon emergence, but it takes several seconds for the odor to travel to the farter's nostrils. If farts could travel at the speed of sound, we would smell them almost instantly, at the same time we hear them.

Is it true that some people never fart?

No, not if they're alive. People even fart shortly after death.

Do even movie stars fart? (Question submitted by Mermaid2006)

Yes most men take more pride in it than most women. There is a large variation among individuals in the amount of fart gas produced per day, but the variation does not correlate with gender. I have read that men fart more often than women. If this is true, then women must be saving it up and expelling more gas per fart than men do.

Do men's farts smell worse than women's farts?

Based on what I have experienced of women's farts, all I can say is that I hope not.

At what time of day is a gentleman most likely to fart? (Submitted by David)

A gentleman is mostly likely to fart first thing in the morning, while in the bathroom. This is known as "morning thunder," and if the gentleman gets good resonance, it can be heard throughout the household.

Why are beans so notorious for making people fart?

Beans contain sugars that we humans cannot digest. When these sugars reach our intestines, the bacteria go wild, have a big feast, and make lots of gas! Other notorious fart-producing foods include corn, bell peppers, cabbage, milk, and raisins. A friend of mine had a dog who was exceptionally fond of apples and turnips. The dog would eat these things and then get prodigious gas. A dog's digestive system is not equipped to handle such vegetable matter, so the dog's bacteria worked overtime to produce remarkable flatulence.

What things other than diet can make a person fart more than usual?

People who swallow a lot of air fart more than people who don't. This can be cured somewhat by chewing with your mouth closed. Nervous people with fast moving bowels will fart more because less air is absorbed out of the intestines. Some disease conditions can cause excess flatulence. And going up in an airplane or other low-pressure environment can cause the gas inside you to expand and emerge as flatulence.

Is a fart really just a burp that comes out the wrong end?

No, a burp emerges from the stomach and has a different chemical composition from a fart. Farts have less atmospheric gas content and more bacterial gas content than burps.

Is it harmful to hold in farts?

There are differences in opinion on this one. Certainly, people have believed for centuries that retaining flatulence is bad for the health. Emperor Claudius even passed a law legalizing farting at banquets out of concern for people's health. There was a widespread belief that a person could be po isoned or catch a disease by retaining farts. Doctors I have spoken to recently have told me that there is no particular harm in holding in farts. Farts will not poison you; they are a natural component of your intestinal contents. The worst thing that can happen is that you may get a stomach ache from the gas pressure. But one doctor suggested that pathological distention of the bowel could result if a person holds in farts too much.

How long would it be possible to not fart? (Question submitted by Ineed69too)

As I understand it, a captive fart can escape as soon as the person relaxes. This means that a lot of people who assiduously refrain from farting during the day do so at great length as soon as they fall asleep. Having been on a great many overnight field trips, long bus trips, and trans- Pacific flights, I can personally vouch for the fact that lots of people do fart voluminously as they doze off. So the answer to the question would be, you can refrain from farting as long as you can stay awake!

Do all people fart in their sleep? (Question submitted by MrBlack)

I have not made a scientific study of this, but I don't think all people fart in their sleep. I think mainly those who refuse to fart when they're awake do so when dozing off. For other people, toilet training takes such a strong hold that they let nothing pass their sphincters in sleep. For these people, the gas accumulates in the night and they vent it upon awakening.

Where do farts go when you hold them in?

How often have you held in a fart, intending to release it at the first appropriate opportunity, only to find that the fart has disappeared when you are ready for it? I asked several doctors where the fart goes. Does it leak out slowly without the person knowing it? Is it absorbed into the bloodstream? What happens to it? The doctors agree that the fart is neither released nor absorbed. It simply migrates back upward into the intestine and comes out later. It is reassuring to know that such farts aren't really lost, just delayed.

How can one cover up a fart? (Question submitted by Mouseweed)

There is a company called Fartypants that sells underwear designed to absorb the odor of farts. If you should be caught without your Fartypants, another ploy is to blame the dog or cat, if one should be present, or complain about how the wind must be blowing from the direction of the paper mill. As for the sound... if you are in a large group of people, act oblivious and innocent, or glance quickly at the person next to you, as if you think he/she did it. Other strategies include coughing or suddenly moving your chair so that people think that they misheard the fart.

If you are with one other person, you can act as if nothing happened, and the other person may believe he was mistaken in thinking he heard a fart. CJT addresses the problem of farting loudly in a public restroom as follows: "My solution: use a handful of loose toilet paper, cover your butt hole and it will muffle the farting; my friends and I call it the 'Buff Muff'!" Depending upon the company, another strategy is not to cover it up, but to proudly proclaim the fart as your own grand accomplishment and to issue a challenge to the others to outdo that one if they think they can.

Is it really possible to ignite farts?

The answer to that is yes! However, you should be aware that people get injured igniting flatulence. Not only can the flame back up into your colon, but your clothing or other surroundings may catch on fire. A survey done by Fartcloud (the site, alas! is no more) indicates that about a quarter of the people who ignited their farts got burned doing it. Ignition of flatulence is a hazardous practice. However, if you want to try it, and you don't have a friend to light your fart for you, you might find it easier to accomplish the job using the Fartlighter. There have also been cases in which intestinal gases with a higher than normal oxygen content have exploded during surgery when electric cautery was used by the surgeon.

Why is possible to burn farts?

Farts burn because they contain methane (usually) and hydrogen, both of which are flammable gases. (Hydrogen was the same gas that was used in the ill fated Hindenburg dirigible.) Farts tend to burn with a blue or yellow flame. 

credit given to original author if known


Song of the Day

"Enjoy Yourself"
~ Todd Snider

Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think.
Enjoy yourself, while you're still in the pink.
The years go by, as quickly as a wink.
Enjoy yourself, Enjoy yourself,
It's later than you think.

You work and work
For years and years
You're always on the go.
You never take a minute off,
Too busy making dough.
Someday, you say, you'll have your fun
When you're a millioniare.
Imagine all the fun you'll have
In some old rocking-chair.

Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think.
Enjoy yourself, while you're still in the pink.
The years go by, as quickly as a wink.
Enjoy yourself, Enjoy yourself
It's later than you think.

You're gonna take that ocean trip
No matter come what may.
You got your reservations
But you just can't get away.
Next year, for sure, you'll see the world,
You'll really get around;
But how far can you travel
When you're six feet underground?

Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think.
Enjoy yourself, while you're still in the pink.
The years go by, as quickly a as wink.
Enjoy yourself, Enjoy yourself
It's later than you think.

Get out and see the world...

You worry when the weather's cold,
You worry when it's hot.
You worry when you're doing well,
You worry when you're doing not.
It's worry, worry all of the time,
You don't know how to laugh.
They'll think of something funny
When they write your epitaph.

Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think.
Enjoy yourself, while you're still in the pink.
The years go by, as quickly as wink.
Enjoy yourself, Enjoy yourself
It's later than you think.


Facts about the human body

1. Fingernails grow nearly 4 times faster than toenails.

2. There are 206 bones in the adult human body, but 300 in children (some of the bones fuse together as a child grows).

3. The human eye blinks an average of 4,200,000 times a year.

4. The average person has over 1,460 dreams a year.

5. The longest living cells in the body are brain cells which can live an entire lifetime.

6. There are more living organisms on the skin of a single human being than there are human beings on the surface of the earth.

7. Men get hiccups more often than women.

8. Lorne Greene had one of his nipples bitten off by an alligator while he was host of “Lorne Greene’s Animal Kingdom”.

9. Life expectancy for Russian men has actually gone down over the past 40 years. A Russian male born today can expect to live an average 58 years.

10. In 1985, the most popular waist size for men’s pants was 32. In 2003, it’s 36.

11. Seven percent of Americans claim they never bathe at all.

12. In 2004, one in six girls in the United States enter puberty at age 8. A hundred years ago, only one in a hundred entered puberty that early.

13. Newest trend in the Netherlands: Tiny jewels implanted directly into the eye.

14. A British gymnast survived a fall from a fourth story window because he went into a somersault and came down on two feet.

15. Jeffrey and Sheryl McGowen in Houston turned to vitro fertilization. Two eggs were implanted in Sheryl’s womb, and both of them split. Sheryl gave birth to two sets of identical twins at once.

16. In 1991, the average bra size in the United States was 34B. Today it’s 36C.

17. The average North Korean 7-year-old is almost three inches shorter than the average South Korean 7-year-old.

18. Every year, 2700 surgical patients go home from the hospital with metal tools, sponges, and other objects left inside them. In 2000, 57 people died as a result of these mistakes.

19. We forget 80 percent of what we learn everyday.

20. Pain is measured in units of “dols”. The instrument used to measure pain is a “dolorimeter”.

21. The Amish a diet high in meat, dairy, refined sugars and calories. Yet obesity is virtually unknown among them. The difference is since they have no TVs, cars or powered machines, they spend their time in manual labor.

22. As of January 1, 2004, the population of the United States increases by one person every 12 seconds. There is a birth every eight seconds, an immigrant is added every 25 seconds, but a death every 13 seconds.

23. Astronauts cannot burp in space. There is no gravity to separate liquid from gas in their stomachs.

24. The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as a substitute for blood plasma.

25. Fidgeting can burn about 350 calories a day.

26. Wearing headphones for an hour increases the bacteria in your ear 700 times.

27. A baby is born without kneecaps. They appear between age 2 and 6.

28. Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

29. In a recent survey, Americans revealed that banana was their favorite smell.

30. The arteries and veins surrounding the brain stem called the “circle of Willis” looks like a stick person with a large head.

31. Brushing your teeth regularly has been shown to prevent heart disease.

32. A kiss stimulates 29 muscles and chemicals causing relaxation. Women seem to like it light and frequent, men like it more strenuous.

33. Marilyn Monroe had six toes on one foot.

34. Your nose and ears never stop growing.

35. It takes approximately 12 hours for food to entirely digest.

36. Human teeth are almost as hard as rocks.

37. Every time you lick a stamp, you’re consuming 1/10 of a calorie.

38. As you age, your eye color gets lighter.

39. Human thigh bones are stronger than concrete.

40. Your heart beats over 100,000 times a day.

 41. Your ribs move about 5 million times a year, every time you breathe.

42. One quarter of the bones in your body are in your feet.

43. Like fingerprints, everyone’s tongue print is different.

44. Men can read smaller print than women; women can hear better.

45. The average person laughs 15 times a day.


UFC 126: My Predictions

UFC 126 is tonight on Facebook, Spike TV and finally the main event pay-per-view.  As with most UFC bouts, I'll be at BW3 in Austintown if you wanna stop down, but come early if you want a seat.

Here's the lineup card, starting with the prelims first and continuing through the main card.  I judge myself by with two points per bout:  One for the winner, the other for the type of victory.  I don't see a lot of these fights going the distance, which is good for fans.  

That being said, here are my picks for tonight:

Mike Pierce vs Kenny Robertson

Pierce beat Brock Larson and nearly beat John Fitch ... but he was overweight at the weigh-ins and had to cut additional weight, so that may hurt him.  I'm still thinking Pierce is the stronger fighter, I just wonder how much the additional cut will hurt him.

My pick:  Pierce, KO

Kyle Kingsbury vs Ricardo Romero

Romero's a better wrestler, Kingsbury (9-2) has a good submission game, but a weak chin. Romero by TKO in what will probably be the biggest ground fight of the night.  Romero's 11-1 with six submissions and four KO's, so he's a finisher; five of Kingsbury's 11 fights have gone to the judges.

My Pick:  Romero, TKO.

Paul Taylor vs. Gabe Ruediger

Taylor knows how to kick up the excitement and I think he's going to make Rudiger wish he was back in the TUF house eating cake. He looked thin at the weigh-in whereas Taylor looked very natural. 

My Pick: Taylor, KO.

Norifumi "Kid" Yamamoto vs Demetrious Johnson

This fight will be streamed live on Facebook (if you're a fan or UFC on Facebook it's free) and features the debut of Kid Yamamoto, one of the most popular fighters in Japanese MMA with a record of 18-3 with one no contest.  He loves the knockout, and I see him getting KO victory 14 against an overmatched Johnson.

My Pick: Kid Yamamoto, KO.

Michihiro Omigawa vs Chad Mendes

This fight will be live on Spike, again for free. I see Omigawa cleaning the cage with Mendes ... Mendes has heart, is a good wrestler and undefeated, and he's been in some battles, but Omigawa's fighting for his UFC life.  He looked good at the weighins and has changed up his training routine to work his judo and striking better in the cage, which is why he's the fourth-ranked featherweight in MMA.

My Pick: Omigawa, decision

Donald Cerrone vs Paul Kelly

Also on the Spike Prelims Show, this is going to be our first real fight where the fighter who makes the first mistake will wind up asking "What happened?" after waking up, either from a Cerrone knockout or Kelly submission.

My Pick:  Cerrone, KO

Miguel Torres vs Antonio Banuelos

The first PPV fight of the card is going to get fans up and excited to kick off the main card. If you've never seen Torres fight, you have missed some of the most intense action from the WEC. Sure, he's little (135 pound bantumweight division), but he's a buzzsaw. Great strikes, good wrestling.  Torres (38-3) has ended 82% of his fights (9 knockouts, 23 submissions), while Benuelos has left it up to the judges in half of his 24 fights (he's 18-6 overall)

My Pick:  Torres, KO

Jake Ellenberger vs Carlos Eduardo Rocha

I'm not much a fan of either of these guys, but one this is for sure ... they both come to throw, so this will be fast and furious.  I think Ellenberger has the edge in striking and wrestling.

My Pick: Ellenberger, KO

Ryan Bader vs Jon Jones

Great staredowns rarely lead to great fights, but these two have been on a collision course since Jones came to the UFC and started dominating people and Bader blew up the Ultimate Fighter house before winning Season 8.  Both fighters are unbeaten, and everyone who watched the DQ loss to Mark Hamill knows how dominant Jones was in that fight, and how he's been cleaning out the division. Bader has a 10-inch reach disadvantage to overcome, but if he does that, there's still the viscious elbows of Jones to deal with.

My Pick:  Jones, KO

Forrest Griffin vs Rich Franklin

Two guys who love to fight get to fight. To see who's better. That's MMA. It's going to be fun and it's going to be exciting. Griffin needs a win to get back on the horse; Franklin can continue his impressive streak of beating everyone NOT named Anderson Silva.

My Pick:  Franklin, KO; but we all win watching this fight.

Vitor Belfort vs Anderson Silva

Silva's due to fall. Sonnen exposed some holes in his game. Belfort is a tattical striker who finds the holes in everyone's game and hits you hard and fast. If his straight left catches Silva, look for a finish.  But never bet against the spider is the rule, right?

My Pick:  Belfort, KO.

Check back next week to see how I did.