Scanning the globe ...

The news that won't die - apparently three county election workers in Cuyahoga County right here in O-H-I-O are on trail for not properly counting during a recount in the 2004 election ... because they didn't want to have to count again.

Basically, in Ohio, when a recount is ordered, three percent of ballots are hand counted. If the hand count of three percent matches closely enough to the given results, it's good. If not, they pick another three percent to hand count. If those are still off, they count them all by hand.

And it wasn't the democrats that wanted the recount ... it was the Green Party candidate and the Libertarian Party candidate.

The results - after counting 600,000 ballots - John Kerry gained 17 votes; George Bush lost six votes.

So Kerry had a net increase of 23. Which means he still lost Ohio approximately 118,000 votes.

Maximum penalty for the three workers - 18 months in prison.

Link is here.

Reading isn't fundamental(ist Christian).

All I can think of here is a Bill Hicks joke about when a waitress at Waffle House asked him:

"Whatchu readin' for?"

His response, "I've often times been asked what I'm reading. I don't think I've ever been asked what I'm reading for. Gosh darnit, you stumped me. I read for a lot of things, but I guess, mostly, so I don't end up a fucking waffle waitress."

Apparently, a mother in Georgia, thinks we need more waffle waitresses.

She's suing because she wants all Harry Potter books removed from school libraries.

Because they teach and promote witchcraft. And Satan.

"I didn't want to do it if the Lord didn't want me to" she's quoted as saying.

Do what? Evolve? Live and let live? Be sin-free and yet cast the first stone?

Whatever. It is Georgia. I'm sure she'll win.

Hey kids in Georgia - apparently Jesus doesn't want you to read. He wants you to stay stupid. So pick your knuckles up off the ground - stop staring at my opposable thumbs and repeat after me, in your accent:

"Y'all want that in a combo? The extra-large or jumbo sized?"

Link is here.

Playing video games is good?

Apparently, video games can satisfy deep psychological needs and improve people's well-being.

Link is here.

Editorial comment: So can sex. Which is also can be a single or multi-player game. And, even if you do have to purchase, normally costs less than a PS3. And you don't have to wait in line at Best Buy, either. (So anyone up for a match? I'm a great doubles partner.)

Seriously ... when scientists start telling us that video games are good for us ... you know that's some purchased researchtime to pull the plug, on the games, the scientists and the gamers.

Here's some fucking news (seriously):

An AIDS treatment group is suing the company that makes over Viagra because their ads are 'promoting unsafe sex.'

Who's next? Budweiser? Chevy? Those people who tell me it's not my car or the clothes I wear but my timepiece? (Anyone else remember when a watch was a watch? Me too.)

Damn. No wonder our country is fucked.

Welcome to America. Here's a handgun, a beer, some Viagra, a Big Mac, oh, and a lawyer. Enjoy your stay.

Link is here.

How to tell you've wasted your life on an inane pursuit:

I don't know if this is better or worse than the guy studying how video games make us 'feel' ... cause we're all about how we 'feel' these days ... but an expert on the person in the undated da Vinci painting called "Mona Lisa" says he's figured out her maiden & married name, husband's name, their children, when she was born, when she died and where she's buried.

(Insert the voice of Chic McGee:)

That's good work boys.

(Insert the voice of Bob Kevoian:)

Man I don't care.

But if you do ... the link is here. And a life is also available to you, outside. Look into the latter, please.

I love movie soundtracks, usually.

Movie soundtracks are very bizarre sometimes. Like this one, for the movie "Lucky You" starring Eric Bana and Drew Berrymore.

The soundtrack features Bob Dylan, Bruce Springsteen, Bonnie Raitt, George Jones, Johnny Rivers, Shawn Colvin, Ryan Adams ... and then songs from both Liza Minnelli and Drew Berrymore. HAHAHAHAHAHA. Or not.

Testes? Testes? That rocks.

How well do you know your album artwork? I got 40 out of 52. And I'm one of about ten people who got the Marbles album by Steve Hogarth's band.

Test yourself here.

1 comment:

Cin said...

Ooohhh, did you hear Mellencamp on Bob and Tom Monday?? Way cool!

*sighs* I don't know if Drew Barrymore can sing or not....but man does she ring MY bell! *laugh*