Corporate Memos Gone Bad

I know I haven't written The Roadtrip - Day 5 yet ... it's coming.

But I had to share this ... a corporate communication from my company regarding a change in benefit providers. This isn't the whole thing, just the paragraph that makes me think like our help desk and most operations, HR and memo writing for HR has been outsourced to India, too:

Effective July 1, 2006, the administration of your STD plan will be transitioned to (Name of new Insurance Provider Removed). Because (Name of new Insurance Provider Removed) is our standard insurance carrier, we now have an opportunity to more efficiently integrate these two programs. If you are eligible for STD, your 2006 benefits will remain the same with some administrative changes. Please access the Summary Plan Document, found in the Benefits Center on our intranet, for a detailed description of the plan.

(Name of new Insurance Provider Removed) will be sending you an ID card along with more detailed information about their role in handling STD claims. The letter and ID card will be sent to your home address the week of June 19, 2006 and will include a 1-800 number for use when initiating a claim.

For the record, the STD they're referring to is Short Term Disability. However, that's not spelled out, anywhere. I know, because I called our Benefits people and asked.

Because, seriously, the last thing you want to read about from your corporate insurer is an email telling you how to file STD claims.

And the phrase "If you are eligible for STD ..." is a new low in bad memo writing.