Liberals Amuse Me, Volume 1

So the good people at Air America Radio are all out doing their happy little pygmy dances because they're all convinced that they have what they need to impeach President Bush.

And the fine folks who call into Air America, when they're not referring to the duly-elected head of our nation as "The ass in the oval office" or other such praiseful words, are all ecstatic that after five years of trying they've finally found what they think is enough to get GWB out of the White House.

But they're missing the big picture, as usual.

Besides the new rants about the domestic spying, both sets of individuals (those on the air and those who call) are still trying to convince people that both elections that put GWB into the White House were rife with fraud. In fact, last night, the announcer said that he's not expecting much to come out of this latest attempt (but giving it his firm backing, straddling the fence as liberal often do) because the last two candidates the Democrats fielded were, in his words, spineless whiners who cut and run rather than standing and fighting. He said that the entire world knows Al Gore won Florida, and thereby, the 2000 election; and John Kerry rightfully won Ohio in 2004, and thereby, the election, equating popular vote with winning the presidency.

Um, newsflash ... popular vote is not how the President of the United States is elected. Despite what you've heard, we are NOT a democracy. We are a representative republic. Read the Constitution, it's all spelled out there. We the people elect the people who choose the people who pick the president in the Electoral College. That's basic Civics class, like 9th grade ... remember? I do, despite the fact I spent most of my time staring at the amazing well-developed Mary, I still picked up what the man was putting down.

Say what you will about voter fraud and hanging chad ... doesn't matter anymore. Had your guy(s) won either election, we'd be much worse off than we currently are. Would Al Gore have stopped the attacks of September 11th? Would John Kerry have stopped Hurricane Katrina and saved all the black people that GWB hates? I think both of those are a resounding NO.

But regardless, since those defeats, the blowhards on the liberal left, their friends in Hollywood and the media have tried everything they could think of to remove GWB from office, but have yet to have a single one of their side in the House of Rpresentatives initiate an Article of Impeachment (okay, back to Civic class ... [and Mary ... yummy ...] sorry ... in order to impeach a president, a member of the House of Representatives must introduce an Article of Impeachment detailing the violations of law that are considered impeachable offences. Lying under oath, or perjury, which they used against Bill Clinton, is one such offense. The House is currently comprised of 232 Republicans, 202 Democrats and one Independent. So there are 202 potential political enemies who could introduce an Article of Impeachment against GWB, but haven't.)

My take on the whole issue: Politics in America is so ugly, so divided, that this is now the norm. The politics of personal destruction is what runs Washington. No need to see how someone votes, or use their voting record against them. Dig up some dirt, feed it to the talking points, talk radio and television's talking heads and you, too, can ruin anyone and get them out of office, except Ted Kennedy ... but you'll have to ask Mary Jo Kopechne. Oh, wait, she's dead. Never mind.

And until we, as Americans, stop voting red, blue, liberal, conservative, label this, label that ... and start voting American, what's best for the country, it won't change.

But the big picture those looking to impeach President Bush are missing is this ... and a perfect example of Pittsburgh radio legend Jim Quinn's First Law: Liberalism always generates the exact opposite of its stated intent.

Let's imagine that someone in the House does get the nads to introduce an Article of Impeachment. And it passes the House, and the Senate initiates Impeachment actions against President Bush. And the left wins. And GWB is removed from office.

First of all, they're gonna party like Bill Clinton at Spring Break.

Then, they're gonna wake up the next afternoon, hung over, with underage girls scattered about, or, in Ted Kennedy's case, underwater in the back seat of his father's car, but I digress, and reach for the remote to turn on the Communist News Network (CNN) to see how their "victory" is being reported.

Which is when they'll promptly shit the bed when they hear the following:

Wolf Blitzer: Here was the scene today in Washington:

"I, Richard Cheney, do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the office of the President of the United States, and will to the best of my ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States, so help me Halliburton."

And the cameras would zoom back to see those same drunken hungover liberals doing one of two things: Putting the gun to their head and pulling the trigger or sitting, stoic, in a catatonic state.

Because the only person the left hates more than GWB?




That's all you hear when his name is mentioned. Like he's the first guy in history to profit off a war. Please. He's just the latest.

And you're jealous because you didn't buy stock.

But what you're not seeing is the fact that by impeaching GWB and removing him from office, you'd be handing the keys to the kingdom to the Dick Cheney.

And Halliburton.

And that, my friends, is how irony is funny.

"Sometimes I wish your nose was longer
So you'd have an excuse not too see past it."

~Kathleen Edwards

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