You haven't lived until you've borne witness to what I saw today.
Yes, that's right. I challenge ANYONE to defy what I saw was the height of the field it's in.
Allow me to explain.
What I saw was amazing.
It was a once-in-a-lifetime happening … that happened at 10:30 and 2:00 on Saturday, and I believe twice before on Friday and is planned for two or three more times on Sunday; and then other dates and times in other cities, but believe me, you need not see it more than once in your life.
One witness.
One viewing.
One vision.
What, you ask, could be all that?
A rap performance.
Yep.
Me.
Music Snob.
Watching a rap performance.
But I'm not talking just any rapper.
But before I tell you who was the height of the genre … I have to lay down a bit of my rap history:
I've seen Vanilla Ice live in concert.
Really.
But put that aside … I do have a solid grasp on the history of rap. I lived it. I'm old.
I lived in the 'hood when I started junior high school in 1980. I came into my musical being with Grandmaster Flash, and a few years later, Run D.M.C.
I've seen Hammer (as Hammer and M.C. Hammer) on stage. He was amazing. (Seriously. I saw him twice, and enjoyed both shows.)
And I've seen L.L. Cool J blow the roof off a building.
And I've seen Chuck D and Flav (when he was cool the first time) absolutely demolish the crowd at Bogart's in Cincinnati on an amazing hot October night in 1988 that seared itself into my mind and just makes me weep for music today.
Because Public Enemy … Chuck, Flav, Terminator X and Professor Griff … were the high to the low to the end of the show for the rest of their lives.
Nobody did it better.
And nobody ever will.
And to back it up and name check even further ... I even saw Run, D.M.C. and Jam Master Jay step on stage at Live Aid where all the people gave and the poor got paid.
In person.
Because I was at Live Aid in Philly in 1985.
Because I'm old school, bitches.
So old, in fact, I can even remember when MTV played videos.
And they played only white musicians.
And only black people rapped.
So when I tell you I saw the most amazing rap performer on Saturday, I want you to know not only do I have a base to balance that statement against, but the knowledge and experience to show you I'm a subject expert in world of rap performances.
And for the record, I'm not talking about the performer dropping the bomb for a money makin' playa that ain't with us no mo.
Yeah, like Notorious B.I.G.
Hell no.
And for the record, I ain't talking about a gangbanging thug that never seen it comin'.
Yeah, like Tupac Shakur.
Nah bitches, I'm talkin' 'bout muthafuckin' Grumpy Bear and shit.
That's right.
I said Grumpy Bear.
Rapping.
I saw, with my own eyes, on Saturday, in a building I saw both LL Cool J and NWA play, a big blue badass bear rockin' the mic.
Oh yeah.
The Care Bears Live Experience, 'Caring and Sharing Friends' was at Hara Arena on Saturday.
And I was there.
With my daughter.
Who loves her some Care Bears.
She loved the show. She's 8. In a few years she'll refuse to admit that she loved it. Hell, she'll refuse to admit she was there.
But right here, tonight, she's in her glory.
With a new Care Bear (Thanks-A-Lot Bear), a balloon and a Cheer Bear light spinner.
And my wallet is empty.
But my heart is full of the moment when she saw what we were going to. She loved it. In her words, it was "AWESOME."
And not only did Grumpy Bear rap for us, he moonwalked.
Yep.
And he was laying down some heavy shit, too.
His message-based rap taught us that it's okay to play and fun, but sometimes, you have to be serious and solve problems.
Seriously.
Because while the rest of the Care-A-Lot gang was hanging out and having fun with some little white girl who they kidnapped and took to their rainbow and cloud world, Grumpy was a working bear, trying to keep the rainbow reader full so the rainbows in Care-A-Lot would stay bright and colorful.
He was trying to keep it real.
As real as a person in a bear suit playing Hara Arena in
Word to your stuffer.
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