Good thing she likes football ...

As I approach one year of dating Allison, especially over Super Bowl weekend (you'll understand more on that soon), I find myself laughing at all the interesting and amazing ways she and I even managed to become an item.

I'll start with January 2, 2012, which is the day we met. We know this because I have a note in my iPod about the book she was reading, she has a note in her iPhone about a book I suggested to her. We figured that out one day after February 5, 2012. Why? Well, because from January 3 until Super Bowl Sunday of last year, Allison didn't talk to me.

At all.

Why didn't she talk to me?

I defiled her book.

The same book that attracted her to me to begin with.

Let me explain:  Allie is to books like Eric is to technology ... she loves her books. And my 'defiling' of her book was me writing my name and number on a piece of paper (not part of the book) and slipping it between the pages while she was in the bathroom.  Harmless, no?

As it turns out, no, it wasn't harmless. 

She said she found it the next morning while reading in the tub. It fell out of her book. She was hot pissed I touched her book, and proceeded to tear up my name and number, say something along the lines of "Forget that guy" and then gave me the cold shoulder every time she saw me after that.  In fact, I got the back of her head for most of the night when we were celebrating a mutual friend's birthday smack dab in the middle that stretch of 34 days, January 19th for the 32nd Annual Davidus Celebration. Completely ignored me, right up until the night of February 5, 2012, the Super Bowl between the New York Football Giants and New England Patriots.

I wanted to watch the game, but didn't want to watch it alone, so I went down the road to Austintown, Ohio's most diverse meeting place and watering hole, Bill's Place, to watch the game. I haven't counted seats, but I'm guessing there are probably 50 seats at the bar. Bar is a rectangle, all four sides have flat-screens, so it's easy to watch the game from darn near any seat at the bar.

The only problem:  There was one seat left at the bar when I got there.

Next to Allison.

Who I was pretty sure hated me, for reasons I didn't know, or understand. 

But I walked up, and said hi and asked if it was okay if I sat there because there was no other seat at the bar. None.

"If you have to," she said, with a disgusted look.

I sat down, told her that if her friend showed up, I'd give up the seat. 

"Whatever."

And that's how it was right up until about the middle of the first quarter where my series of  witty quips must have broken through the fortress around her books I had built up by defiling her Compendium of The Walking Dead a little over a month prior.

Ten days later we kissed. It was the day after Valentine's Day.

Four days was our first 'real' date ... and it's been all great since then.  I just make sure to ask permission before touching her books now!

So yeah, it's a good thing she likes football, otherwise she might not have ever talked to me again. 

Love you, Allie :*

My 2012 Charity Event - St. Baldrick's Day

Hello. I sometimes forget that not everyone has moved on from Blogger to my Facebook or Twitter feed, so I wanted to let you know that there are less than six days left before I get my head shaved to show solidarity with and raise money for kids fighting all sorts of pediatric cancers.

St. Baldrick's Foundation  is a volunteer-driven charity funds more in childhood cancer research grants than any organization except the U.S. government.  Your gift will give hope to infants, children, teens and young adults fighting childhood cancers. So when I ask for your support, I'm really asking you to support these kids. Thank you!

http://www.stbaldricks.org/participants/ericbroz

As of this posting I've raised $930.  I've promised on Facebook & Twitter that if I get $1,000 I'll keep it shaved completely bald for three months; and add an additional month for every $50 increment over $1,000.

So donate if you can, and if you're local to the Youngstown area, come out and join us on March 10th from 1 to 3 p.m. at O'Donald's Irish Pub & Grille, 6000 Mahoning Avenue, Austintown, OH 44515.

Thanks!

Song Of The Day "This Time It's Us"

"This Time It's Us"

~ Jude Cole

I sat on the roof as the night came down
Looking out over this pitiful town
And thought of you out there back in the race
Looking for someone to take my place
That's when it hit me, that's when the walls came down

You see, I never thought it could happen to us
Now we're going 'round breaking down each other's hearts
So go on and blame me for whatever you must
But we've become just like the ones we laughed about
This time, this time it's us

Up in a watchtower with the streetlights below
In a town full of places that we used to go
And a river of people walking two by two
Everything I see now reminds me of you
That's when it hit me, that's when it all came true

'Cause I never thought it could happen to us
Now we're going 'round breaking down each other's hearts
So go on and blame me for whatever you must
But we've become just like the ones we were laughing about
This time, this time it's us, oh it's us

I never thought it could happen to us
Now we're going 'round breaking down each other's hearts
So go on and blame me for whatever you must
But we've become just like the ones we were laughing about
This time, this time it's us, this time it's us, oh

This time it's us

So long, Evil Genius Idea #895

After months of doing nothing but hosting files ... I decided that it's time to pull the plug on Evil Genius Idea #895, http://www.ericbroz.net ...

Why?

I never use it.

In fact, I've migrated *almost* entirely to free sites such as here, wordpress for my music blog, facebook, Google+ and, sadly, even MySpace (still). I'm gonna keep the domain, but point it to a redirect that sends you to my FB page ... but the email is going away, so anyone who emails me at eric @ ericbroz dot net should change up and hit me at cebroz at gmail dot com.

It was a good four years (well, three, really), but all things change.

Now *THAT* is a weekend.

Wow.  I don't even know how to begin to define my weekend.

Let's just say ... sometimes ... you might wish you were me.

Friday - drinks with friends and Sarah at a bar with hockey AND sound with a vegan lesbian roller-derby-girl bartender next to a guy from Detroit. Was fun until they took the lead with 97 seconds left.

Saturday - Slept in, then went to see a movie with Sarah, had dinner, proposed, she said yes, spent the next hour staring at her ring, and then we hit the bar that has 1,500 types of beer and packed a 10-pack of varied beer to take home and had a couple of nice drafts before retiring for the evening.

Sunday - Woke up smiling ... went to the Pittsburgh Pirates game with Sarah and Aidan. They won.  Yuengling on draft. I won. Sarah and Aidan got to run the bases after the game.  Got home to filter through about 300 messages of congrats from our friends on Facebook. 

We're all winners.

No one can save us ... from Kim the waitress

A long time ago, in a galaxy not too far from where I live now, I had quite a rather funny and unexpected crush that was based kind of on a song that turned into a relationship that ended in one of those full-fledged WTF Just Happened story that somehow seems to populate my life.

After coming back from living in the Virgin Islands, I went back to the newspaper I was working for for a bit, then had a falling out with the new managing editor. Being young and stupid, it was entirely my fault. Long story short ... the boss is the boss for a reason. Listen to what she tells you. Do what she asks. Keep getting your paycheck. Wasn't illegal, immoral or ethically questionable, I was just being stupid.  And I got fired.

Which lead me to the world of Les Nessman ... I got into radio news.  My ex-wife had a job once where their receptionist referred to me as "The Voice" when I called, and lets be honest, I do have the perfect face for radio, and the nose of a news reporter who knows how to ask the hard questions, so I was ideally set for a fine career in radio.  But that's not the story here.

Being young and poor, I had two jobs and I worked weird hours ... was doing radio news from 5 a.m. to Noon, I'd have lunch, then go home and sleep for a bit.  Five nights a week I'd bartend from 7 p.m. to close (2:30), then clean the bar, hit Perkins for breakfast, go home, shower, change clothes and hit the radio station to start the cycle all over again. Apply, lather, rinse, repeat.  One of the places I used to go for lunch was this little deli in downtown Warren that featured old style move themes, with meals named after what they ate in classic films of the 30's and 40's ... Breakfast at Tiffany's was a meal that featured what they ate, they had Bogart and Bacall burgers, stuff like that.

And a really hot waitress named Kim.  

Who I was digging muchly.  Mostly because she was a hot blue-eyed redhead with a great rack and heart-shaped ass. And kinda because of a Material Issue song called "Kim The Waitress" from the Freak City Soundtrack that was a great album that was out about the time I first walked in there. But she had pursed lips and tender hips, and they were turning in my head, as the song goes.

I should have taken that as a warning.  I didn't. As Warren Zevon once said, "I went home with a waitress, they way I always do."  My first wife was a waitress when we were married, I'd dated a couple of waitresses or servers since we separated, and Kim was the last that was an actual waitress when we dated.  But anyway ... no one can save us from Kim the waitress, as the song goes, she always turns me on.

Anyway ... I'd always ask for her section and we always would talk about all sorts of things. She was smart.  And pretty. Oh so pretty. And that bothers me in places below the belt!  But I didn't think I stood a ghost of a chance with her.  All of which matched up to the song.  Especially the second verse: 

"Sometimes she comes with coffee
Leaning over, pouring
I'd like to gently pull her to me
Kiss her, with no warning
Seeing her some sunny Sunday morning"

Me being me, and the flirt, I kept talking to her, asking about her, what she did, what she liked, all the things that a guy does when flirting. And she'd flirt back.  If it was slow she's sit beside, me, not across from me.  And when she found out that I worked for the radio station around the corner, she said she listened every day.  People say they listen/watch/read to anyone who's on that air or in print, but it's a common courtesy ... most of the time it's pandering.  She started quoting me lines I'd used on the air.  Okay, I was impressed.  I figure I'll ask her out.  And I do.

So the day I finally asked her out, it was gangbusters. I asked her out, she said "how about this afternoon?"  I said sure. At 26 I could go a day or three without sleep to spend time with her. The deli was a breakfast/lunch only place, so they closed at 2 and she was done at 2:30.  So we talked. She got my number, I told her where I lived (it was above a business).  She said she knew where it was, and would come over after work.  She did. And started stripping as she walked in the room. It was mad monkey love for a couple of hours, then she got dressed, kissed me goodbye and said, "Let's do this again." No real first date ... no need to wine and dine her ... I'd show up for lunch, she'd just come over and we'd have sex.  At 42, I pick that vibe up right away ... but being 26, I was semi-clueless.

The only thing we ever did together in public was doing the Reading for the Blind ... it was  a community service thing she talked me into doing. We'd meet there and read the stories from the newspaper in a little studio that recorded them, put them on a phone bank for the blind to call in and listen.  Again, this was 1994, the internet wasn't all it is today.  That, lunchtime talks and sex was our entire 'relationship' ... and it was going on six or seven months.  But the sex was good, so I was happy and didn't look beyond the here and now.

Again, being 26, I never put any relevance to us never going out, no dinner, no movie.  She told me after the first time not to give her cards, or flowers, she didn't like them, and not to let on at work that we were an item as her boss didn't want the staff hooking up with customers because it was bad for business.

Yeah, again, all clues that today I'd say "Oh, well, I'm just a side project."  But I wasn't all that smart back then.  Until one day, about six or seven months after we first hooked up. I had a rare Saturday morning off from the radio station. So I went home after going out with friends (didn't bartend the Friday night shift, ever), woke up about 10 a.m., grabbed the newspaper, and headed over to a little diner for breakfast because they had killer omelets.  And I used to work there as a dishwasher, so I knew the family that ran it.  I thought about calling her

This was before cell phones were a commodity and readily available, back when the phone was something on the wall in your house, not in your pocket.  But she and I never really talked on the phone. She'd call me when she was home.  Said she was 'too busy' and I should just let her call me.

Again, all things I should have picked up on ... but didn't.

So, it's a nice sunny Saturday in May, I'm sitting at the diner reading the paper and enjoying both a fine cup of coffee and a Big Jack, I pause on the society section of the paper for some odd reason because a picture catches my eye.  I stare at it and realize that I'm reading my alleged girlfriend's and certified sex friend's engagement announcement.  How special.

I don't say anything on Monday when I see her for the Reading for the Blind.  But I do invited her over Tuesday ... she shows up about 2:40, gets naked, we're having sex, she has no ring on, so I let the day play out.  As we're done ... and she's getting dressed, I say, "Hey, I have something to show you."  And hand her the announcement. 

She looks me dead in the eye and says, "I never told you I had a boyfriend?"  I said, "No."  She then proceeds to tell me that they've been together for five years (she's 24), and he doesn't know anything about me.  She called sessions with me as "going to the gym" and he never questioned it.  She said she'd still like to come over because I was good in bed and fun to talk to.  While both of those are compliments, at 26, I wasn't looking for a sometimes sex thing ... I wanted it all.  So I ended it with her.  

The worst part ... I really missed the Bogart burger.

"Kim The Waitress" ~ Material Issue

Pursed lips and tender hips
Turning, in my head
Writing poems in a corner booth
That I'd die, if she read
Seeing her in but a silver cross
Lying on her bed

No one can save us
From Kim The Waitress
No one can save us
From Kim The Waitress
Nobody can save us
From Kim The Waitress
Always turns me on

Sometimes she comes with coffee
Leaning over, pouring
I'd like to gently pull her to me
Kiss her, with no warning
Seeing her some sunny Sunday morning

No one can save us
From Kim The Waitress
No one can save us
From Kim The Waitress
Nobody can save us
From Kim The Waitress
Always turns me on

She doesn't come around anymore
And that bothers me
And that bothers me
Yeah, it bothers me

Though I don't stand a ghost of a chance with her
She's pretty (and that bothers me)
So pretty (and that bothers me)
And it bothers me

No one can save us
From Kim The Waitress
No one can save us
From Kim The Waitress
Nobody can save us
From Kim The Waitress
Always turns me down

No one can save us
No one can save us
Nobody can save us

The Sound of Sneezing ... a song parody

Once again I'm destroying a great 60's song with one of my weird-ass brain farts.  Sorry, Paul Simon ...

The Sound of Sneezing

Hello head cold, my old friend
You've come to infect me again
Because of you I'm always sneezing
My nose is stuffy I'm not sleeping
And the virus that was planted in my body 

Leaves me snotty
And brings the sound of sneezing

In restless sleep I toss until
I get knocked out by the NyQuil
Beneath the soft glow of the TV
That big sneeze you heard was all me
My nose is stuffed
and my eyes are watering too
All I hear is "Bless you"
Amongst the sound of sneezing

And in the grocery store I saw
Ten thousand remedies maybe more
All I hear is me sneezing
Breathing through my nose is just wheezing
My ears are clogged 

And my tissues are snot-logged
All I hear is the sound of sneezing

"Fools," said I, "You do not know
Head colds like a cancer grow."
Avoid my sneeze is what I teach you
So droplet particulates will not reach you
And wash your hands with hot water and soap

Don't be a dope
Or you'll echo the sound of sneezing

And now I humbly bow and pray
To the green liquid that Vicks made
As my nose gives me a warning
Another big sneeze it is forming
And the words of the prophets are written on the bottle side. 

A font both bold and wide:
A NyQuil coma will silences the sound of sneezing.

Polar Bear Plunge for Cancer

So ... I decided to embark on a fund-raiser ... I'm going to do a Polar Bear Plunge into the icey waters of Lake Milton to raise money for the American Cancer Society.

The goal is $100 per person ... I kicked my campaign off with a $25 donation, then decided to test the website with a $5 donation (because I'm an IT Nerd like that and have to test a link before I can recommend it).

So ... that being said ... I have 19 days to raise $70 ... who's with me?  Click here to donate!

And if you're interested in watching, March 5th at Lake Milton is where the plunging will be happening.

And yeah, I'll be wearing nothing more than a swim suit and sneakers (because it's a long, cold walk to the water ... shoes are needed!)

My 'other' 2010 wap-up

RANDOM:


Stayed single the whole year?
No. Fell in love with an amazing woman :D

Were involved in something you'll never forget?
Absolutely ... several things!

Dyed your hair?
Yeah. I l thought I  looked to old to date her ... she said she'd break up with me if I ever dyed it again.

Came close to losing your life?
We're all day-to-day.

Saw one of your favorite bands live?
Many of them. And often.

FRIENDS:

Did you meet any new friends this year?
Absolutely

Did you hate anyone?
No. When you hate someone you give them a piece of you that you never get back.

Do you have any regrets when it comes to your friendships?
Nope. Actually reconnected with a couple of great people that were previous regrets.

BIRTHDAY:

Did you have a cake?
No

Did you have a party?
No

Did you get any presents?
A kick-ass stick-figure video from my daughter. And that's better than presents.


YOU:

Did you change at all this year?
A few things. For the better.

Did you change your style?
I have style??  Actually, I started working at home in September, which has seriously reduced the number of days a week I wear pants.

Were you in school?
School of life

Did you get good grades?
I'm still living.

Did you have a job?
Yeah, and I worked far too many hours.

Did you drive?
Yes! Lots of places.

Did you own a car?
Yes. Ivy ... the pine green Saturn with the "Chewie Is My Co-Pilot" bumper sticker.

Did anyone close to you give birth?
No, but I have two great friends who will have babies in 2011.

Would you change anything about yourself now?
Can't change what's happened. Why worry about it?

MORE:

Was 2010 a good year?
2010 was a very good year


Do you think 2011 will top 2010?
Yep

Kissed in the rain?
Yes. Comfest. With Sarah!

Had your heart broken?
No

Done something you've regretted?
No ... I don't regret, I evolve.

Painted a picture?
No

Wrote a poem?
Yes

Ran a mile?
No. Walked 2.5 miles a couple of times. Rode my bicycle 1.8 miles quite a few days. And other days rode it 21 miles.

Visited a foreign country?
No.

Cut in a line of waiting people?
Yeah, but I'm gangsta like that. I was in and out of Wal-Mart on Christmas Eve twice without ever having stood behind anyone in line.

Told someone you were busy when you weren't?
Ask me about my crippling social anxiety

Cooked a disastrous meal?
Yes. Had a recipe for something in an 8x8 pan and made it in my 9x9.  It pretty much sucked.

Lied about how old you were?
No.

Disappointed someone close?
Yes. But was to take it back, as we learned from "The Green Mile"

Hid a secret?
No. I was seriously honest and open with somethings in my life that had been hidden secrets for far too long and it really felt good to get over them and move on.

Pretended to be happy?
Nope.

Slept under the stars?
Nope. I have sleep apnea. Camping means we have to have power.

Kept your new years resolution?
Don't make them.

Forgot your new years resolution?
Don't make them.

Pretended to be sick?
Sick days are vacation days, too

Lost something expensive?
No. But I did burn out some sectors on my iPod screen.

Learned something new about yourself?
Absolutely

Stayed up til sunrise?
Yes.

Cried over the silliest thing?
Yeah, but I always cry when I see babies born.

Spent most of your money on food?
Depends on your definition of food.

Had a fist fight?
No ... but there are several I'd like to punch in the face.

Gotten sick?
Yes.

Liked more than 5 people at the same time?
No.

Wrapping up 2010 with 50 Questions

So here's my End-O-Year Roundup. Last time I ddi this was for 2006. So, if you're a blogger, fill this out yourself.

1. Was 2010 a good year for you?
It was a very good year.

2. What was your favorite moment of the year?
Falling in love. And realizing it before I let her get away.

3. What was your least favorite moment of the year?
The hours I worked.

4. Where were you when 2010 began?
Playing Apples To Apples with my daughter and some great friends.

5. Who were you with?
Cammi, Cindy, Mark, Alex, Donna and a bunch of other kids.

6. Where were you when 2010 ended?
In Columbus at a New Year's Eve bash that featured lots of friends, a gang fight, gunshots in the parking lot and kicking off 2011 with the love of my life!

7. Who were you with when 2010 ended?
All sorts of friends who I won't name or tag to protect the guilty, but Sarah was there so my 2011 started off super!

8. Did you keep your new years resolution of 2010?
I don't make resolutions.

9. Do you have a new years resolution for 2011?
No, as I said, I don't make resolutions. Here's why

10. Did you breakup with anyone in 2010?
Sarah. Because I'm stupid like that. Luckily she took my dumb ass back!

11. Did you make any new friends in 2010?
A whole shitload. I'm social like that.

12. Who are your favorite new friends?
Favorite friends? What are we, in high school? (Okay, Sarah, Amber, Megan, Brian, Mike N, Mike J, Jen R and most of the rest of the new friends I made!)

13. What were your five favorite moments of 2010?

1. March. Met Sarah. Nuff said. My daughter turned 12 and my friends are seeing how much like me she is now that she's on Facebook and cracking them up, too.
2. May.  Sarah kissed me for the first time. And stole my heart.
3. June.  Sarah and I went to a lesbian wedding in Cincinnati and a Pirates game in Pittsburgh the same weekend and followed that up with our first Comfest the next weekend.
4. October. Vacation with Sarah and Aidan when we spent my birthday weekend hitting Delaware, Maryland and Virginia with my daughter and Aidan got to visit his first lighthouse.
5. December. Getting back together with Sarah after getting over some serious personal bullshit I needed to deal with.

14. Did you travel outside of the USA in 2010?
Nope. I'm getting xenophobic in my old age. I'd rather explore what greatness our country has to offer.

15. How many different states did you travel to in 2010?
Seven. PA, WV, MD, VA, KY, NY, DE

16. Did you lose anybody close to you in 2010?
No, I don't think I did. A couple of friends, they're alive, but we're not friends anymore. Which isn't always a bad thing.


17. Did you miss anybody in the past year?
No. I'm a heartless bastard. (Yes, of course, everyone misses someone, so I'll pick Mary!)

18. What was your favorite movie that you saw in 2010?
Zombie Women of Satan

19. What was your favorite song from 2010?
"Fuck You" - Cee-Lo Green and "You Were Always The One" - Patrick Park

20. What was your favorite new album from 2010?
Two Cow Garage "Sweet Saint Me"

21. How many concerts did you see in 2010?
Hahahahaha. No idea. Lots. Lots. Lots.

22. Did you have a favorite concert in 2010?
Madison Square Gardeners at Rhumba when Aaron basically fell into my arms during a guitar solo. That was kick ass.  Sarah had never seen me in Rock-Out mode until that night.

23. Did you drink a lot of alcohol in 2010?
Depends on your definition of a lot.  I'll say I drank more than some and less than others.


24. What was your favorite joke from 2010?
A Tennessee couple, David and Rebecca Kosmitis, both self-admitted rednecks have nine children. They went to their family doctor to see about getting David 'fixed.' The doctor asked why after nine children they decided to get this procedure done. David replied that they had heard on the Glenn Beck show that one out of every 10 children being born in the United States was Mexican and they didn't want to risk having a Mexican baby because neither of them spoke Spanish.

25. What was your favorite photo you took in 2010?
 Jim Stratton of Gingerspittz that I shot at at VexFest. 

26. What was your favorite party of 2010?Probably me, the night I crashed the Women's Only dance at live music trivia at O'Donalds. It also involved me throwing my Chicago Blackhawks jersey on backwards to dance to Kriss Kross's "Jump" and forgetting my friend Brian was there when I saw him a couple of days later.  Sadly, NOBODY got video of that event.  Luckily, I wasn't driving.

27. What was your favorite holiday of 2010?
St. Patrick's Day.  Kegs and Eggs at 5:30 with Natalie & Pat followed by all sorts of fun, a nap, and a return to hang out with Leslie.  And again, luckily, I wasn't driving.

28. Did you do a lot of drugs in 2010?
Nothing illegal. 

29. How many people did you kiss in 2010?
I don't kiss and tell, but Sarah was the best and most fun to kiss!

30. Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year?
Nope. If I'm gonna do - or say - something, I'm not going to second guess, regret, wallow or feel shamed after.

31. What was the worst lie someone told you in 2010?
I don't like movies.

32. Did you treat somebody badly in 2010?
Depends on your point of view. He probably thinks so.

33. Did somebody treat you badly in 2010?
Again, depends on your point of view. I think I was treated fairly this year by the lack of "Dear (person/place/business), Fuck You. No, seriously, fuck you." blogs.  But I was tempted. (See #32)

34. How much money did you spend in 2010?
(Checks W2 to see how much money he made in 2010. Checks bank account. Yep, about that much).

35. What was your proudest moment of 2010?
Getting over some serious personal bullshit that has been holding me back in relationships for a long time.

36. What was your most embarrassing moment of 2010?
Answering the door at home (and nobody but Sarah ever visits me) to find a pollster asking me to sign a petition, then saying "Well, with that shirt I doubt you'd be interested."  For the record, I was wearing a shirt that says "I shaved my balls for this?"

37. If you could go back in time to any moment of 2010 and change it what would it be?
I can't, so why bother ... but maybe signing her petition anyway.

38. Compared to this time last year, are you happier or sadder?
Happier. Much happier.

39. Compared to this time last year, are you thinner or fatter?
About the same, really

40. Compared to this time last year, are you richer or poorer?
About the same.

41. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Wow, I did so much in 2010 than I've ever done I really can't answer this.

42. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Been an ass.

43. What was your favorite TV program?
Flash Forward.

44. What was the best book you read?
High Fidelity by Nick Hornby

45. What was your greatest musical discovery?
British Sea Power.

46. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010?
Casual ... or well, since I work at home now, pantless.

47. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Same as the past 20 years - Julia Fordham.

48. What political issue stirred you the most?
How shitty the media is. Or our new governor overlord killing high speed rail in Ohio.

49. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010:
You can't change the past. So pack it away and move forward.

50. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
"You shot through my anger and rage
To show me my prison was just an open cage
There were no keys no guards
Just one frightened man and some old shadows for bars"
    Bruce Springsteen - "Living Proof"

My Favorite Albums of 2010

#1 without a doubt and no, it wasn't even close ... my favorite album of 2010:

Two Cow Garage - Sweet Saint Me

Once again, this band blows me away by constantly and consistently upgrading the quality of their music.  2010 was a HUGE year for this band from Columbus, Ohio ... from bassist Shane Sweeney discovering the joys of fatherhood to Micah Schnabel releasing a solo album (see "When The Stage Lights Go Out" below for more on that) to blowing up SXSW and leading an impromptu parade through Comfest and two tours that crossed the country, these boys were never home.  Now that the line-up is complete and they've been playing together for two complete albums now, Cody Smith (drums) and Andy Schell (keyboards) round out the amazing sound of the fifth full-length release from the best band you've probably never heard of.

Highlights:  Jackson, Don't You Worry; Sweet Saint Me; What Dying Is For; Brothers In Arms

The rest of the Top 10 ... in no particular order:

The Madison Square Gardeners - Taste The Thunder & Tune It Up, Dime It Out

Released as two separate EP's in 2010, the six-track "Taste The Thunder" and the five-song "Tune It Up, Dime It Out" make a terrific 43-minute trek through the greatness of this band. Aaron Tasjan's lryics continue to grow and I'd listen to Rich Hinnan play me anything on that slide lap steel guitar he has.  They're spending December recording new tunes and playing a residency at Rockwood 2 in New York City; and I can't wait to hear what goodness comes out of these sessions.

Highlights:  Blessing; Shoe Gaze Band; Everybody's Girl; Cross The Line; Love's The Only Way

David Ford - Let The Hard Times Roll

My favorite troubador is back again with thirteen more tunes that have been in heavy rotation in my iTunes/iPod since earlier this summer.  He's had some problems with his record companies seemingly closing up shop overnight, but continues to putting on shows, working his way across America and his native UK.  The lyrics keep getting better, starting with the CD's first song, "Making Up For Last Time" and "Nothing At All" ... introspective, outlandish and socially commentary all at the same time.  It's nice to see him continue to evolve and keep his fires burning.

Highlights:  To Hell With The World; Making Up For Lost Time; Nothing At All; Hurricane

Semi-Precious Weapons - You Love You
I was hesitant to put this on here because it contains four previously releasedsongs from their two independent releases, but they're still opening for Lady Gaga, they're still delivering the glam and the glitz and showbiz to people who either love them or hate them.  The new material is good, I really love "Leave Your Pretty To Me" ... in the words of frontman Justin Tranter, "The Midwest loves a fucking power ballad."  Same with "Look At Me" ... but "Sticky With CHampagne" and "Statues of Ourselves" are just kick-ass fun tunes about living a rock-n-roll lifestyle on the glamours side of the tracks.  Subtlety is not his strenth, so listener beware!

Highlights: Look At Me; Statues of Ourselves, Put A Diamond In It; Her Hair Is On Fire (2010)

Mary Chapin Carpenter - The Age of Miracles
I've been an MCC fan going on 20 years now (thanks, neighbor who turned me on to her) and am glad she continues to make great American music that's no longer classified as 'country' ... it's more folk, alt-countrish ... what we now call Americana.  This 13-song collection features a lot of stripped down acoustic tracks that let her voice, and her lyrics, shine.

Highlights: I Have A Need For Solitude; We Traveled So Far; The Way I Feel; Zephyr.

Gaslight Anthem - American Slang
It's not as great as their first release, "The '59 Sound" ... but it still has been rocking my world. They're so throwback to when all you needed was three verses, a bridge, a catchy chorus and and a great hook and riff. This album brings all that.  From the title track to "The Queen of Lower CHelsea" to "Old Haunts" .... there are tracks here that will stay with me my whole life.  "I called for my father but my my father had died. And you told me fortunes in American slang."  ... fucking genius.

Highlights:  American Slang; We Did it When We Were Young; Queen of Lower Chelsea; Boxer

Chumbawamba - ABCDEFG
Say what you will about how tired you got of "Tubthumping" ... you still sing it.  That was really NOTHING like the band is about (as the disappointing album sales to folks who love/loved that song show). I've played songs of this CD for people and they all say the same thing ... "I like this, who is it?" followed by "Really? I never would have guessed that."  They're really rather mellow and fun to listen to. This album includes such fun songs as "Torturing James Hetfield" by forcing him to listen to their greatest hits album (to which Hetfield sings along); "Dance, Idiot Dance" and "The Same So-So Tune" ... none of which have any resemblance to "Tubthumping" ...

Highlights:   Torturing James Hetfield; Dance, Idiot, Dance; Singing Out The Days; Missed

Cee Lo Green - The Lady Killer

I had no real desire to listen to this CD ... a friend asked me if it was on my pirate sites ... so I broke all sorts of international copyright laws and downloaded it for her.  After I delivered said pirate CD she asked if I had listened to it .. I said "No, I'm not a fan of Gnarls Barkley."  She gave me the STFU look and said, "You really need to listen to this."    So I did. And then I decided that Cee Lo Green was the love child from an orgy of The Temptations, Gladys Night, Aretha Frankin, all the original members of Chicago, Earth Wind and Fire, and several members of the Pips.  It's all sorts of 70's soul and the Motown sound mashed up with all that's good about today's rap/R&B that doesn't involve autotune.  Yeah, I was floored.

Highlights:  Fuck You; Satisfied; I want You; Fool For You; Wildflower

Victoria Vox - Exact Change
Step by step, left right left, this CD just hooked me with the multitude of hooks in songs, choruses, brigdes and verses in a way that no other album did in 2010.  Victoria's approach to songs, songwriting, singing and performance blew me away when I saw her in Columbus. She's a blast to watch live for both the ukalele and mouth trumput.  And she sings songs in French.  Without surrendering to invading German armies. 

Highlights:  Oh I Wonder; Techinocolor Way; Make  A Mess; Shake It Up; Shake It Up

Patrick Park - Come What Will
I don't know how or where this CD came into my collection ... all I know is it really blasted me out of some unhappy mindframes to some hapy mindframes.  That's what I love about music .. that ability to transform my mood from shitty to perfect with just a guitar and some words.  "You Were Always The One" is my song of the year for 2010 ... because ... well ... yeah ... it so fits my life and makes me smile. Because I found my one. And lost her. And found her again. So yeah ... when he sings this, I get it:

"Now mistakes it's true I've made more than a few
and I'm goin to make many others
And it's hard to see why we go through this sometimes
All the things that we do to each other
And I don't understand while I play these games and I trade the truth for lies
Cuz you're always the one I was looking for babe, it just took time to realize"

Highlights:  You Were Always The One; You'll Get Over; Silence and Storm; Starry Night

Bonus CD:  Emma Pollock - The Law of Large Numbers.

She's Scottish. She writes killer lyrics. She sings like she's chasing Satan back to hell to take over. She doesn't give a shit what you think.  I wanna have her babies. That's why she gets the Bonus CD

Highlights: I Could Be A Saint;  Letters To Strangers; House On The Hill; Hug The Piano

The Next Ten:

Doug Keith - The Lucky Ones
Dar Williams - Many Great Companions
Bookmobile - The New Patriot
British India - Avalanche
Ed Kowalczyk - Alive
Steven Page - Page One
Spoon - Transferrence
The Hold Steady - Heaven Is Whenever
Kings of Leon - Come Around Sundown
Lady Antebellum - Need You Now

Your mileage may vary. Tell me who I missed. Who I got wrong. And if your comment contains Eminem, Kanye West, Kid Rock or any other shit fuck suck-ass alleged musician I reserve the right to call in coordinated strategic nuclear strikes to kill you.

Yo, Adrian!

Well, once again I'm off to Philadelphia, City of Brothers on Drugs (to quote Spit, Choke & Puke Sports) for a week of all sorts of fun disaster recovery exercises.

And yes, that's sarcasm.

It's been a long time since I've NOT wanted to get in the car and go go go ... I guess that's what happens when you finally realize who and what matters in your life.  All you want to do spend time in that world.

Needless to say, It's been a rather interesting six weeks in my world.   Mentally and emotionally,I've been as low as I've ever been, and higher than I've ever imagined.   I've confronted demons and dealt with angels. I've spent a lot of time digging through my past and I've cleaned out a lot of the clutter in my head and my heart that was holding me back from the happiness we all pursue.  I've laughed. A lot. I've cried. A lot. And I've grown. A lot. And it's been very nice to know my friends are supportive, and for that, I'm appreciative.  And I'm back on the happy side of life, and happier than any other time in my life, except that first time I held my daughter. 

And, most importantly, I was able to share the things that have shaped me, wrongly or rightly, with an amazing woman who understands, who cares, who listens and who loves me like I've always wanted to be loved.  I hope I can give her that same love in return. I plan on doing my best in that department.

I'm happy.  And I like this happy.  It's new to me. And I want to explore, expand and revel in it ... but sadly, at least for this week, t's time to hit the road. Bring on the cheesesteak!

(Dear Mary: Sorry there's no venom here.  Oh, wait, I hate the Detroit Red Wings.  With a passion.  Satisfied now? :P )

I'm really hating the email lately ...

In addition to having to weed through 569 emails following my 11-day vacation from work, I was roaming around my personal inbox and found something that just made me smile ear to fucking ear.

For reals. Ear-To-Fucking-Ear.

Delivered to me via the wonders of Yahoo email, was a missive I've been dreaming of receiving.  And no, it wasn't Anna Kournikova naked.  (That's an old virus, people!) What I received, for all intents and purposes ... was news I'd been waiting to hear for a long, long, time.

FINALLY ... I had an opportunity to break free from Armstrong's One Wire and Infinite Problems.  I work at home I need both internet and phone bundled, and DSL isn't an option where I live, neither is Time Warner (who I loved in Niles)  And there are three reasons I can't get a dish ... first because I live on the wrong side of the building; second because I need better internet speeds than they offer; and finally, because I have to have a bundled phone solution for work. 

So to hear that another option ... and one I wanted ... was finally available in my area ... I was stoked beyond belief.

I'll use the good points from their email in quotes ... read along with my excitement!

"Retire cable. The future is here."    YES ... I can get rid of Armstrong's shitty cable/internet/phone service! So I kept reading what was available based on this finely crafted marketing email ... and hell yeah I was picking up the pimp hand to dial the phone and sign up for this shit!

Check out this impressive list of features:

• "HD TV and DVR
• "Record up to four shows at once, play them back in any room
• "Pause in one room, resume in another
• "Playback recorded shows on all TVs at once, at different times
• "TV packages starting at $19 a month. 
• "Access to 130 HD channels and growing
• "Schedule DVR sessions and watch TV on your smartphone
• "Professional standard installation included with most packages
• "No term commitment
• "A 30-day money-back guarantee - bring it all home with no risk and all reward" 

How fucking cool is all of that?  Beats the fuck out of Armstrong feature wise, price wise, and since it's all new fiber that's been run to support this ... odds are good I'd not have had to call Armstrong every other week when my shit breaks and I can't porno surf.  (I mean, can't work. Yeah. Can't . Work.)

Then, in what has to be the biggest taint-kick in my recent karma history, I got down to the last line:

"Please call us today at 1-800-FUCK-YOU to enable AT&T UVerse service at your OLD ADDRESS IN COLUMBUS.  HA Fuck you, fanboy.  You suck."

(Okay, maybe I made up some of that statement, but seriously, AT&T finally is offering UVerse in my old neighborhood in Columbus ... and since I asked for it on their website ... oh, two years ago when it wasn't available, they decided to tease me now that it is ... and because I don't live there anymore.)

/fuckers

Dammit, I lost my stress

So ... after more than 15 months of an insane workload that included moving from Columbus back to Youngstown and three large enterprise level projects that pretty much killed my life ... I'm FINALLY going to take some time off work here in September ... basically starting Friday and running through September 14th, when I return to the office.

Except "the office" is now my dining room, as officially, beginning tomorrow, I'm one of the thousands of 'virtual employees' that work from a home-based office.  So, here's my evolving home office:

This isn't the final view ... I've not finalized it yet ... there will be three 22" wide screen monitors rather than the one 22" and one 19" you see ... and a filing cabinet on the left with a printer on top, but this is pretty much what I'll be working with from a furniture point.

This is what it replaced.  So yeah ... huge increase in desk space, work space, looks and ergonomics.

In addition to that ... two of the biggest projects I've ever worked on both ended today.  One of them piggybacked off the huge anti-virus project I was that started in July 2009 ... so I've been kicking ass at work basically since July 2009 without stopping.

Then, as of today, it just stopped.  The projects ended, the speculation as to us being home-officed or forcing to move to another location ... ended.  We're virtual ... and as for the hard-core projects ... I'm back in the general work-flow, not dedicated to huge projects that kill my life.

For the first time in 15 months not only can I breathe, but I feel like I can get stuff done.  Today I did six loads of laundry before noon.  I slept great last night for the first time in probably six weeks (which included two on-call shifts).  I'm just finally in a good point personally and professionally.  It's weird for me, having not had either, basically for three years now.

I think working from home is going to be a HUGE part of that.  There's no stress in driving to work ... I'm not spending $5 on breakfast and $10 on lunch every day;   I have a kick-ass desk, and home office setup. My company is paying for my Internet and phone, and since I'm not working in Youngstown anymore, I'm not paying that insane income tax ... so I'll have more money in my pocket and less stress about getting to work.  A seven-step walk beats the hell out of a seven-mile drive ... especially with winter coming this way soon.

Another big part is the confidence I've gained in these three projects ... I went from standard day-to-day support to three enterprise level projects that impacted 3,000+ servers and forced me to step up my game to deal with something on this scale.

And then there's my personal life, which is also rolling along nicely and enjoyable.  Things with Sarah have had a couple of ups and downs, but we've worked through them and are moving forward. And I'm glad I'll have more time to enjoy it.  I signed a new lease so I'm going to be in Austintown for another year, which is good with me ... I like Austintown ... and to be honest, I really wasn't in the mood to move again.  I like my little box at the top of the stairs. But I have no Indian rug or a pipe to share, sorry.

But yeah ... finally ... I really feel I can relax. I can breathe. I can enjoy my non-working hours doing things I want to do ... and not spending all day and night sitting in front of my computer building servers or cleaning viruses and all that stuff.

Yay me!

"Getting Revealed" - Behind the Scenes

So now Facebook has this thing called "Get Revealed" where your friends can ask questions about you.  And if you answer enough questions about your friends, you can find out who said what about you.

Because yeah, that's why I lose sleep at night, wondering what people really think of me.

So, being the guy who reveals the man behind the curtain whenever possible, I took my current 61 questions, removed the duplicates and decided to not only tell you if you're right or wrong, but expound a bit on it.

With that being said ... I've broken down the questions by how the questions were answered ... Yes or No.  Let's get to me getting revealed:
 

Things you said NO to:
 

Do you think that Eric Broz has ever been unfaithful in a relationship? 
Correct. I’m not and never have been a cheater.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz grinds their teeth while sleeping?
Correct.  I’m not a grinder.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz has a bad haircut?
Subjective.  It’s hair. It changes every so often.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz has bad breath?
Correct.  Ahhhh … minty fresh.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz has ever failed a class?
Wrong. I failed Statistics. Twice. Because 2+2 is always four. I don’t care about your probability.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz has ever stolen from work?
Wrong. Everyone steals from work. Time, Internet bandwidth, smoke breaks, office supplies, CDs, DVDs, you get the picture.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz has ever stolen money from their friends?
Correct. I’d rather be broke than screw over a friend.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz has ever used steroids?
Wrong. I was on them a couple of times for injuries. Not for personal use. And I was never injected by Jose Canseco.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz is a poser?
Correct. Because, tru ‘dat, homie. Damn, those bitches actin’ all Asian ‘n’ shit. That shit is whack!
 

Do you think that Eric Broz is a tree hugger?
Correct. I have a Cartman tattoo.  I hate hippies.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz is cute?
Subjective … this is the one that one person voted yes, one person voted no.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz is dumber than Jessica Simpson?
Correct. But, dammit, I wanted to eat some sea chickens, too.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz is hyper?
Correct.  I go with the flow.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz is ignorant?
Correct. I’m not insane, either. My mother had me tested.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz is lazy?
Correct. Unless it’s football Sunday. Or football Saturday. Or I need to catch up on the DVR. Then I’m a regular couch-dwelling sloth.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz is socially awkward?
Wrong. Uh, ask me about my crippling social anxiety.  (That’s rhetorical. I don’t want you to ask.)
 

Do you think that Eric Broz is tone deaf?
Correct. I will admit to being deaf to Nickleback and other shitty bands  like that.

Do you think that Eric Broz likes British accents?
Wrong. Julia Fordam sounds delicious in everything she does. And she’s British.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz likes chick flicks?
Wrong. “Sleepless in Seattle,” “League of Their Own” and “You’ve Got Mail” are among my favorites.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz still wet their bed in 6th grade?
Correct.  In 5th grade I started breaking into other classmates houses and wetting their beds.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz would help an elderly woman cross the street?
Correct. And yes, I was a Boy Scout.
 

Do you think that you can beat Eric Broz in a fight?
Correct. Because I know kung-fu, and five or six other Chinese words.
 

Does Eric Broz have a nice butt?
Subjective. My butt’s not for everyone.
 

Would you go skinny dipping with Eric Broz?
Correct. I don’t skinny dip. I chunky dunk.
 

Totals for the NO Round: 
 

Collectively … 15 correct; six wrong and three subjective out of 24 … when you factor out the subjective, you’re collectively five for seven.  Not bad.
 

Things you said YES to:
 

Do you think Eric Broz can actually hook up with someone out of their league?
Correct. Have you seen my girlfriend? General consensus is she’s out of my league :D
 

Do you think Eric Broz is cute?
Subjective. Someone answered this as NO last time, so it’s a wash.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz brushes their teeth regularly?
Correct. Thanks!
 

Do you think that Eric Broz can run a mile without stopping?
Wrong. Sorry. I’m old, fat, out of shape and have horrible knees. If you see me running, you better drop what you’re doing and follow me because if I’m running, it’s from something bad.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz can throw a football with a spiral?
Correct. Every year I wait by the phone during the NFL Draft, but nobody calls. Hell, Tim Couch and Brady Quinn were both drafted.  Jamarcus Russell and Ryan Leaf, too.  Then, again, I am old, fat, out of shape and have horrible knees.  I feel like Joe Nameth. I should grope an ESPN sideline reporter now.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz has a funny looking nose?
Correct, and I agree. Broken a few times playing hockey, or fighting.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz has ever been in a fist fight?  

Correct. I have. Bobby Hunter in 6th grade was probably the last planned fight. Wasn’t the flag pole at 3 p.m., but it was close. I think I won. He had a black eye when we were done.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz has ever failed a test?
Correct, I have. Spanish in 12th grade. And several Statistics classes.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz has ever fooled around at work?
Correct. I have. And that’s all I’ve got to say about that!
 

Do you think that Eric Broz has ever had a 1 night stand?
Correct. I’ve had as little as a 20-minute-stand, once; and several one-night stands. One lasted a couple of weeks.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz has ever played beer pong?
Wrong. I’ve played several drinking games, but not beer pong.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz has soft hands?  

Correct. I type all day. I don’t do much else with my hands, so yeah, they’re soft.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz is a good driver?  

Correct. I’m an excellent driver. Dad lets me drive the car. But only up and down the driveway.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz is a good friend?
Correct. I do my best.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz is cute?
Subjective. That was asked in the NO section.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz likes chick flicks?
Correct. As stated before, I love me some chick flicks.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz owns a nice car?
Subjective.  If you consider a 2001 pine green Saturn 4-door nice, yay you.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz spends more than an hour on facebook everyday?
Correct. I’m a junkie. But not because of Farmland or Frontierplace or stuff like that.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz watches porn?
Correct. I was once told there was porn on the Internet I’ve not seen, so I have to keep up.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz watches the TV show "24"?
Wrong. I watched about half of the first season and realized there’s no way one guy can drive all the way across LA in less than an hour.
 

Do you think that Eric Broz would look good in tights?  

Wrong. Ever see hair through tights? Not a pretty look. And I’m not shaving my legs. My knees have enough scars.
 

Do you think your first impression of Eric Broz was right?
Subjective. Not sure who said this or what their first impression was.
 

Is Eric Broz a reliable person?
Correct. I do my best to be on time, every time.
 

Is Eric Broz fun to be around?
Correct. I’m the life of the party!
 

Is Eric Broz's profile picture cute?
Subjective.   The Sarah half of my profile pic is SUPER Cute … my half … meh.
 

Would Eric Broz make a good spouse?
Subjective.
 

Would you introduce Eric Broz to your family? Correct. And thanks. Parents love me.

Would you trust Eric Broz with your life?
Correct. And again, thanks. I got your back.
 

Totals for the YES Round: 
 

Collectively ... you got 18 correct; six wrong and four subjective out of 28 … when you factor out the subjective, you’re collectively three for four.  Not bad at all.
 

Grand Totals:
 

Out of 42 total non-subjective questions, you collectively got 33 correct.  

That’s 78%, congrats, you’ve passed this test!

You know me. You really know me!

Oh, I'm such a nerd, Part ∞

So ... over the past several months, I've been given two hard and fast rules for dating Shoes.

1. Don't break my heart.
2. Don't cheat on me.

Simple enough, right?

Unless you're my brain.  Which automagically starts creating equations and algorithms on how those two rules coexist and work in tandem in a single line of code that's easily uploaded to my brain to allow me additional storage space so I can recite song lyrics, movie quotes, the manufacturer's part number to the bumper bracket for a 72 Volvo or pertinent information such as ... well ... anything but song lyrics, movie quotes, and the manufacturer's part number to the bumper bracket for a 72 Volvo.

So ... as my thought processes go absurdly apeshit with this, as they do with EVERYTHING, I realize two additional constants:

If I break rule 2, I break rule 1, by default.  (NOTE TO SELF:  NEVER, EVER feed gremlins after midnight, or break rule 2).
If I break rule 1, I am free to break rule 2, by default.  (NOTE TO SELF:  NEVER, EVER, get gremlins wet, or break rule 1).

Now, keep in mind I have ZERO DESIRE to break EITHER rule, or feed gremlins after midnight, or get them wet, let alone break Rule 1 in order to nullify Rule 2.  I've never cheated on anyone I've ever dated, lived with, married or stalked.  

On top of that, I've never been happier in a relationship with a woman in my life.  (Apologies to anyone reading this I dated, lived with, married or stalked.) Hell, most of you (well, not the ones I stalked), have said to me they've never seen me happier; and to her, they've never seen me happier.

(and thanks, the checks are in the mail.  Well, if I wrote checks. Or used snail mail. Paypal is much easier.)

(can I add more parenthetical statemets to a blog?)

(Oh, yes, I can.)

(Because it's my blog.)

(Notice how the punctuation is in the inside of the parenthesis?  That's how it should be. Grammar rules.)

ANYWAY ...

So as I was laying down beside a sleeping Sarah, trying to sleep myself, since it's 4:28 a.m., and since I'm failing miserably, because my brain is running all over the place trying to work some logic to combine those two rules into one rule and do it so I can't break either, and do it logically, without using if-than and goto statements because I'm a nerd who's not a programmer ... and do it using binary constants because I'm a computer guy ... I end up sitting here trying to write all this out because I'm a wordy guy.

(See, hug it out. It's easier.)

Yeah, welcome to my world.  Words. Math. Computers. Binary languages. Sleep deprivation. Love. Sex. Beer. Try for the green area around the $1 because you have twice the chance of winning big money in the Showcase Showdown.  And fuck the first prize package because it always sucks.

ANYWAY ...

I've broken it down to this single line of code, which has been uploaded to my central processing unit:

01001000 01100101 01100001 01110010 01110100 01100010 01110010 01100101 01100001 01101011 00100000 00110000 00100000 00101011 01000011 01101000 01100101 01100001 01110100 00100000 00110000 00100000 00111101 01000101 01110100 01100101 01110010 01101110 01100001 01101100 00100000 01001000 01100001 01110000 01110000 01101001 01101110 01100101 01110011 01110011 00101110

Upload complete.  Yay me!

(for the non-binary speaking individuals, that means Heartbreak 0 + Cheat 0 = Eternal Happiness.)

Yay me!

What a weird couple of months ...

Well, I feel bad ... neglectful, even ... leaving my blog here to wither and die while I'm out living life and having fun.

/not really

Actually, it's been a rather hectic couple of months in my life.  

• I finished one big project at work and got immediately got pushed into another big, highly visible project that is actually 180 degrees different than what I was doing.
• I started doing more photography, including branching out into working with a group that goes to Bike Nights with models to pose with you and your motorcycle looking all sexy.
• Had a great roadtrip to Maryland and Virginia with my daughter, who's now up in New Castle for a bit, so I'll be seeing a lot of her in the coming weeks :D
• I got to witness the only professional sports team I've ever had an emotional investment in win their league's championship ... that's right ... the Chicago Blackhawks are your 2009-2010 Stanley Cup Champions.  I hope everyone gets to experience the feeling of their team winning it all (Browns fans, I'm looking right at ya!)
• I have a wonderful and exciting new relationship with a fascinating woman who just amazes me more and more every day.  In the Lawgirl style of protecting the innocent, I'll refer to her as ShoeGirl from now on.
• I've been planning my summer activities ... and man is it going to be busy:
• Highlights include the first weekend roadtrip with ShoeGirl next weekend to see a great band (The Filthy Habits), hang out with friends (both hers and mine)  in Columbus; photograph a lesbian wedding in Cincinnati on Saturday followed by a mad-dash Sunday morning from Cincy to Pittsburgh for the Indians-Pirates afternoon showcase at PNC (Probably No Customers) Park. The following weekend:   Comfest.  That's right ... three days of music, beer, friends and fun in Columbus. After that ... July includes a few random getaways with ShoeGirl, including a trip to Middletown and a couple of random baseball games as time permits.

Outside of that ... just been hanging out with the Silver Surfer, Muppet Jimmy, Basketball Brian and the rest of the gang.

What's new with you?

Random Thoughts .. 2010.01

Random thoughts catching up on the DVR: 

• Heroes = meh. I hated the whole Carnival thing. I'm glad it's over. 
• Flash Forward is pretty decent, so far. 
• LOST is becoming interesting as the approach the end.
• Caprica is the best show on TV. Best. Show. Ever.
• Yuengling Bock is okay. Yuengling Lager is still my favorite.
• 60 minutes on the elliptical every day feels pretty good.
• I miss having a girlfriend.  But I won't settle for less than who I want.
• My daughter, who just turned 12, is AMAZING.
• Futurama is a pretty funny show I never paid attention to.
• I miss seeing good bands.
• I'm glad my project at work has ended and I can have a life again.

It's not you, it's me. Really.

The map of another sadly typical day for me:  (well, the sickness isn't typical. I think it was just something I ate Monday night might have been left out too long.

• Finished working about 3:30 a.m. Tuesday.  Went to bed.
• Woke up about 8:30 to the alarm clock on the table and an alarm clock from my stomach not feeling good. Fighting a stomach flu most of the morning.
• Finally got out of bed feeling empty and slightly better at 12:30 p.m. after the DayQuil Cold & Flu set it.  
• Started working while sipping soup about 12:45. p.m.
• Conference call from 2 until 3 p.m.
• Working on my Anti Virus client upgrades until 5:30 p.m. 
• Nap until 10 p.m.  when the actual client upgrades started.  Difficult region, lots of manual remediation.
• Start working at 10 ... finish up at 4:00 a.m.
• Will probably get to sleep until about 8:00 a.m. when the phone will start ringing with complaints about the upgrades.

So ... as to why most of you don't see or hear from me, this is what I've been doing since January started.

It's not you, it's me.  Really.

I totally was Sheldon tonight

So despite my dislike of most sitcoms ... I have become a fan of The Big Bang Theory.  Perhaps because I've been told I'm a perfect mix of Sheldon and Leonard.  Sheleonard, in fact, was a name given to me by a friend.  I find it amusing. I'm nowhere NEAR that smart, nor that full of useless information, but to be recognized as such for the intelligence and randomness and ability to technical on people is rather amusing.

Then again, I do support Sheldon's take on astrology:  "Yes, it tells us that you participate in the mass cultural delusion that the sun’s apparent position relative to arbitrarily defined constellations at the time of your birth somehow affects your personality."

But anyway ...

Today, we had snow. And ice. And as anyone who lives in an area that gets such delicious precipitation in cold months can tell you, almost everyone hates cleaning off their car.  That's why they build garages and buy carports.

However, I got to use science on my (probably low-double-digit-IQ) neighbor who, as he said, plays guitar for a living.  Now that's not an insult at guitar players, but seriously ... you make a living playing guitar in Youngstown, Ohio? We're the cultural armpit of America. Hell, a local hero (Kelly Pavlik) couldn't sell out a Division II college basketball arena (Beeghley Center) for a world title fight (WBO and WBC Middleweight belts, which he holds) in his home town.

Then again, there wasn't beer at the fights because the fine people promoting the fight forgot to apply for a beer permit, assuming the venue would have one.  That's good work boys.

But back to my neighbor.  Who I've heard play guitar while he sits on his patio. I'm thinking people pay him to STOP playing, but what do I know?

I'm out there scraping my windows, in 25 degree temperature, wearing a hockey jersey, no hat, no gloves, jeans and shoes ... he's bundled up in a big-ol ghetto bubble jacket with fur-lined gloves and a hat under his hood, shivering like it's 50 degrees colder than it is ... struggling like hell to clear the ice off his windows.

I whip through my car, front, back, all four sides, and clear the snow off so it doesn't blow onto the front or back windows ... he asks where I got such a great snow scraper.  I said "Speedway Gas Station. Was all of two dollars."  He said he paid ten bucks for his, and his handle was metal and mine was wood.  I told him it's not the tool, it's how you use it.

"What?"

And then, my friends, it went all sciencey:

Me:  "You're scraping your windows wrong.  Because the glass is at an angle the snow or ice forms with a bottom heavy crystal structure. You're scraping side to side, which is against the grain of crystal. I'm scraping top to bottom, therefore, attacking the offending ice crystals at their weakest point, the top. That's why my two dollar ice scraper is out performing your ten dollar one. It's knowing how to defeat your enemy and doing it with the least physical output."

Him (trying and realizing top to bottom works much better): "You're pretty smart."

Me (externally): "Thanks."

Me (internally): "Bazinga, I don't care."